It’s easy as a new couple to get so wrapped up in each other that you forget about the activities you used to enjoy doing alone.
Like with many of the things you’re trying to accomplish in your life, you may find, as time becomes more and more limited, the trick is working smarter not harder. And that’s the same for showing your partner he or she is a priority.
Anything that is already fun is made so much more fun by his presence. Going on vacation with him is like vacation squared, because life already feels like a vacation with him, and now you’re literally on vacation with him. Unless of course, the opposite is true, and you feel many good times have been ruined by yet another fight with your boyfriend, or one of his moods.
I once could never imagine displaying any true anger towards my partner. I believed we’d always communicate calmly, like adults, without letting emotions get in the way or making us say things we don’t mean. I thought that if I ever yelled at a partner or he yelled at me, that that would mean the relationship was over.
On the rare occasion that you do fight, it ends quickly. You can typically squash it and get back to feeling totally affectionate and playful within 48 hours. That’s just how strong your connection is, and how much you both genuinely want to get back to getting along.
Create limitations around phone communication, since this can spark codependent behaviors. Don’t text him all day or start every morning and end every evening on the phone with a guy you just started dating. Keep it casual. Touch base once a day with some short texting. Call a couple times a week.
Men in relationships tend to learn the beauty of just staying in. While, when many of them were single, they were all on a text thread with their boys about where they were going out that night, committed men see how nice it is to be in a quiet place with people you love, rather than a loud one with tons of strangers. And they start applying that to their friendship hangouts, too.
If you become one of those couples attached at the hips, the individuality of each of you will cease to exist. The person you fell in love with will fade away. You need to give him space to continue to be the individual you fell for, as he does with you.
You must step away from most social engagements to have an argument outside. You may even leave a lot of social occasions early—important ones, like your best friend’s birthday dinner—to fight.
If I was unhappy about something in a past relationship, saying something about it felt like a huge deal. I’d have anxiety before bringing it up. I’d go over my speech in my head. Communication didn’t come easily—as it does in my current relationship.
You just can’t spend your life with someone to whom you must constantly explain yourself. Your partner should just get you. He should give you the benefit of the doubt. He should understand your intentions, and not take everything you say the wrong way. If he does, that’s just not the person for you. You shouldn’t feel judged in your relationship.
You consider it your personal duty to cheer up your partner when he’s feeling down. You would never let him mope by himself, and just leave until he felt better. You’re a team—if he’s down, you feel down, too. So naturally, you want to cheer him up. You pamper and baby him if you must.