You know what you did with those dumb boys: if you had a bad day, you didn’t tell them. They made you feel like time with them was meant for fun and not real life. So you had your “relationship” and then you had the rest of your life, and you kept the two separate, so as not to burden your man (boy). But the man who wears his heart on his sleeve is okay with you letting him know what's going on your life.
As for his real therapy sessions, you’ll want to know about those. How could you not? And he’ll want to share with you. But you may have opinions on what his therapist says (especially if any of her notes are about you) and you could wind up influencing his therapy sessions—not for the better.
When a man cries in front of you, do not point out the crying. Just don’t do it. Hug him. Talk him through it. But do not tell him how much it means to you that he feels comfortable crying in front of you—it’s that very comment that will make him uncomfortable doing so in the future. Act as if crying is the most natural, normal thing in the world—a non-issue, really. And do that by not even mentioning it
You find yourself calling friends a lot to consult them about what you should do about your relationship problems. In fact, a lot of your time with friends consists of you talking about your relationship problems.
If he threatens to harm himself, call his best friend or his family. You shouldn’t stay with someone merely because you’re afraid of what he’ll do to himself if you leave. That is a dark, terribly unhealthy and unsustainable dynamic. Get him help.
People with BPD can, unfortunately, lie a lot. They may do this when they’re having a manic episode. Say they are convinced they need to accomplish a certain project. They will do whatever they have to do so, including lie to people around them.
Yes—when you are vulnerable, you can get hurt worse than when you were guarded. But you’ll be hurt far less frequently. Since you’re so open about what you need, you avoid unsatisfactory situations that you used to get dragged into.
When you really love your partner, you want a little affection first thing in the morning—your partner’s snuggles energize you for the day. You don’t hop out of bed without them.
(function(d, s, id) { if (d.getElementById(id)) return; var js = d.createElement(s); js.id = id; js.src = ‘//cdn4.wibbitz.com/static.js’; d.getElementsByTagName(‘body’)[0].appendChild(js); }(document, ‘script’, ‘wibbitz-static-embed’)); The word “defense” doesn’t have any place in a relationship. If you feel the need to use it, that means you and your partner have stopped playing for the same team. “Defense” is a […]
Although your childhood experiences may not be as apparent how it affects your love life as an adult, it has a huge impact.