Things Every Woman Wishes Her Man Kept In His Apartment - Page 12

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Male apartments aren’t always very female-friendly, and when you start spending a lot of time with a guy and begin sleeping at his place more than not, you can start to miss some of the amenities of your own space. You find yourself at brunch with your makeup only partially done wearing yesterday’s underwear because, quite frankly, you just can’t prepare for the day the way you need to at your boo’s place. If you’re a guy who wants a woman to be a repeat visitor then you should know; here are things women wish men kept at their place.

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Um…food!

Most men I know have beer, condiments and maybe some chips. Their eating habits consist of waiting until they’re starving, ordering delivery then, eating everything, and then waiting until they’re starving again. But a woman needs snacks.

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Backup toilet paper

You should always have at least four roles at all times. If you just have one role, then your poor girlfriend will be rationing off TP every time she pees for fear of leaving you with none when you need to handle serious business.

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Good mirrors

The mirror on the medicine cabinet, which is caked in months of toothpaste and only shows our boobs to our forehead, won’t cut it.

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A trash can in your bathroom

Women produce a good amount of trash in the bathroom. We need somewhere to throw the wrappers of our disposable razers, somewhere to shake off our blush brush, and somewhere to throw (hello!) tampons! Don’t make us walk to the kitchen to throw away our tampons.

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Organized soap

It seems like men just use a nondescript bar of soap for…everything. Are we supposed to put this bar on our face when you put it who knows where? How do men live with a bar of soap and a bottle of shampoo alone?

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Tissues

Hey, we cry when we watch movies, okay? So if you’re going to force us to watch this war documentary you’re so set on, then you need to put tissues nearby. And a trashcan for those tissues.

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More evolved cookware

How are we supposed to make you dinner if you don’t even have a cutting board? Oh, you cut your vegetables on a plate. Great. That’s probably why you’ve broken half of your plates.

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More places to hang things

If you want to know why our clothes end up in your lazyboy, it’s because that is the only item in the room beside the bed and the floor. Would it kill you to put some hanging hooks over the back of the door?

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A bedside trash can

You know, for things like condom wrappers and empty lube bottles. And candy wrappers for the treats we eat in bed. Trash accumulates in the bed so just…put a trash bin near it.

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A hair brush

Believe it or not, a lot of men don’t brush their hair. They have short hair, so they don’t think they need to brush it (they’re wrong). But that doesn’t change the fact that when we sleep over, and you want to take us to brunch, we go out with a nest on our heads.

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Wine glasses

Do we have to drink wine out of your college mug? We’re trying to have a romantic evening here.

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An iron or steamer

I’m not sure why, but men don’t seem to worry about wrinkles. So when their female friend wants to get the wrinkles out of last night’s dress for this morning’s breakfast, she’s out of luck.

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Coffee maker

A decent amount of men I know get their coffee at a coffee shop every day. That is a waste of money, but furthermore, some people (like women) don’t like to leave the house until they’ve had their coffee. We can’t even draw our eyeliner on straight without coffee.

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A shoe rack

If you want your dates to take their heels off so as not to disturb the downstairs neighbors, give them somewhere to put their heels. And no, the pile of shoes already on the floor is not that place.

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Some alcohol variety

If you’re over the age of 25, then it is time for you to keep a full-stocked bar (or at least a partially stocked bar.) Oh, and partially stocked doesn’t mean two different types of beer.

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Air freshener

Sir, you may have a high tolerance for the smells you create in the bathroom, but your date doesn’t. In addition to that, she may need to cover up some of her own smells.

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A real dining table

Just because you don’t have a dining room doesn’t mean that the couch and the coffee table should be your dining table.

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Things on the walls

Sometimes a man’s apartment can feel a bit like the psych ward of a hospital because there is nothing on the walls except the crude drawing his college buddy made him.

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Somewhere for guests to sit

At the moment, you have one couch and one lazyboy chair. That’s great if you just have your girlfriend over but what if she was hoping you could have a few friends over? Now people are sitting on the floor.