Truths About Cheaters, As Told By Mistresses - Page 5

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Many women who date married men won’t admit it (and for a good reason–they aren’t exactly an admired group in society) but they do have quite a bit of insight into a unique (and abominable) group of men. You learn a lot about somebody when they’re doing something they are ashamed of, or shouldn’t be doing at all. You see what drives people, what motivates them, and what terrifies them when they’re up to no good. Mistresses get to know men during complicated and raw points in their lives–if anybody knows why men cheat, it’s the women with whom they do the cheating. Here are truths about cheaters, according to mistresses.

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Men need loving mothers

A lot of men who cheat didn’t have loving mothers. That causes them to need more than a sustainable amount of attention from their wives, which is why they look elsewhere.

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A lot of cheaters like to take care of people

If and when the last point is true, men who cheat are often hypersensitive to people who are in need of love or resources, which is why they often cheat with women who are poorer than them or in need of some help.

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There is a slight level of sociopathy

They have to see people, in some way, as objects to carry out what they do.

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Their masculinity is usually threatened

Cheaters usually have their masculinity threatened in some way at home, whether that’s a wife who makes more money than them or isn’t paying enough attention to them sexually.

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You’re a device or utility

The mistress is usually a utility, and she is easily replaceable. Any woman who would fill the void the man has would do.

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They really do believe they’ll leave their wives

Many of them really can envision leaving their wives but ultimately are too comfortable in their situation and afraid of change to do so.

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They’re terrified of being alone

Cheaters usually have a deep-seated fear of being alone. Their mistress comes into play when they feel lonely or neglected.

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You’ll lose the trust of your friends

If you sleep with married men, your friends will judge you, and won’t trust you to be honest with them or to behave yourself around their husbands. The man you’re cheating with will use this as fuel to encourage you to keep cheating with him–he’ll say you have nobody else at this point.

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And future partners

Anyone you date who knows about your mistress past will have a very difficult time trusting you. Some men you cheat with may bring this up, also as a way of keeping you around.

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They become paranoid about you

The cheating man will always worry that you’re cheating on him. Since he is a cheater and liar he believes everyone is.

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They can be control freaks

Cheaters often think they know what’s best for everyone and will tell you what career steps to take, who to hang out with and what to wear.

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The wife is usually negligent or needy

The wife is usually emotionally or physically distant in some way, or she is smothering her husband.

But the man is insecure

The wife’s distance or clinginess isn’t an excuse for cheating–cheaters are just cheaters and infidelity is how they handle marital upset.

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They’ll try to have it all

Many are delusional and will try to have their marriage and their mistress for as long as possible until someone else stops it.