These Are Signs You Are Too Bossy Around The House

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When you live with your partner one of you is bound to come out as the natural leader around the home. It is very rare that both people are equally powerful when it comes to decisions like which brand of toilet paper to buy, when to throw out foods, and when “quiet hour” begins on weeknights. Somebody has to take some initiative but sometimes that somebody can let their position as boss around the house go to their head. Just because your partner lets you make a lot of decisions doesn’t mean he wants you to—he may just think arguing about it isn’t worth the trouble. But you should be aware if your partner doesn’t feel at home in his, well, home. Here are signs you’re too bossy around the house.

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Your partner scrambles when you get home

When you walk in the door, your partner jumps off the couch and starts nervously tidying up. He’s afraid that he must have missed something that you’ll get mad about. He does this, instead of greeting you with a hug and a kiss.

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Your partner explains every grocery

You look at the groceries your partner purchased, and he explains each one, almost as if he is justifying them. It’s like he made purchases on the company credit card for goodness sake.

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He won’t make simple decisions without calling you

He won’t choose a light bulb without calling you to make sure you approve of that light bulb. Why? Because he knows if it’s not exactly what you want, you’re just going to return it. Even if it is basically exactly what you want.

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He asks you where every dish goes

He doesn’t dare put a bowl in a cabinet before confirming that’s where you want it. He knows the hurricane you can become when your favorite bowl isn’t in your favorite place.

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And where every linen goes

He knows you have some elaborate system to separate face towels from hand towels, kitchen towels from bathroom towels and guest towels from the rest of the towels.

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He texts to ask if the TV is too loud

Before you’ve even said anything about it, your partner texts you from the other room to check that he doesn’t have the TV on too loud. He is anticipating the, “Could you turn that down?!!” text from you.

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He says “Okay” and “Sounds good” a lot

When it comes to decisions around the house, “Okay,” “Yup,” “You got it,” and “Sounds good” are his favorite terms. They certainly wouldn’t be, “Well actually, I was thinking…” Oh no—that wouldn’t fly.

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He avoids the kitchen like a plague when you’re in it

He’d rather not attempt to help make dinner since you’ll just tell him he’s chopping the vegetables too thick or keeping the stove on an increment too hot.

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You interfere when he’s talking to the plumber

When the plumber is at your home, and your partner is already in the middle of a conversation with him, you come in and completely monopolize it. This is after you gave your partner a checklist of things to bring up to the plumber.

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He consults you about every big purchase

Your partner would never buy a new set of speakers or upgrade your Internet service without consulting you. He probably wouldn’t even buy himself an expensive suit without consulting you.

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But you never consult him, and he doesn’t complain

Meanwhile, you never consult your partner before making large purchases, and your partner doesn’t complain about this. It’s hugely hypocritical of you, but your partner knows you’d throw a fit if he said so.

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You check his work on the dishes

After your partner washes a dish and hands it to you to dry and put away, you inspect it. Sometimes you give dishes back and say he missed a spot and he doesn’t even question you.

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You check his dusting

After he runs the duster over the television stand, you run your finger over it to see if he did a good job. And after he cleans the floors, you rub white socks on them to make sure they don’t pick up any dirt.

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You give him instructions for simple tasks

You give him instructions that are so long they take longer to read than the task would itself. You’d think your instructions on where everything goes in the fridge were a complex scientific equation.

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When you say your partner’s name, he looks afraid

When you call your partner to you from another room, he comes in with a very timid look on his face. He assumes he’s done something wrong. Sometimes he comes in explaining something before you’ve even spoken.

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Your partner doesn’t have friends over

He says they don’t want to inconvenience you or it’s just easier at their place. What he means is that nobody has fun at your house because they’re afraid they may crack open a beer too loudly.

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Your partner shows you when he does a good job

Your partner brings you the vacuum after he’s fixed it to show it off and sends you photos of the paint job after he’s patched it up. He needs some damn applause since he usually just gets criticism.

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You don’t trust your partner’s research

After your partner has spent an hour researching the best deals on a rental car for your vacation, you go on the computer and do the same research.