15 Things To Try When You Have Anger Problems
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Life can be stressful. And sometimes it puts us in a place where anger is hard to shake. At first, it’s easy to point the finger at who or what sent you into “I just can’t today” territory. But when the stress won’t let up, soon everything sends you from 0 to 100.
Thankfully, when life hands you salty lemons there are things that you can do about it. Stick to these techniques and you will not only find a way to relax, but even help take the power away from what’s disturbing your peace.
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Breathe Deeply
Slow breaths in and out can calm any situation down long enough for you to take a step back before you say or do something you will regret. Just breathe with this gif for a minute or so and you will feel those tense feelings slip away.
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Eat Something
Never underestimate the power of low blood sugar to take your emotions to the next level. Have a snack — something sweet works best — and wait 30 minutes. You will likely feel more balanced after you’ve eaten a little something.
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Go Lavender
Grow a plant by your desk, rub on a little lavender-scented lotion or get a lavender bath bomb. Lavender is known for helping to calm and relax you.
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Listen to Upbeat Music
New age “soothing” music doesn’t cut it as well as turning up to a tune like “Happy.” It will lift your spirits when something is determined to bring them down.
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Distance Yourself
Whether it’s your 9 to 5 or your family that is driving you crazy, a little distance can give you some perspective. Take a break from what’s making you mad (even if it means taking a mini vacation) and you will avoid getting worked up long enough to see a solution.
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Think Before You Speak
If saying something you regret later sounds like your familiar way of doing things, it might be time to work through your emotions before you speak. Even if you have to discuss certain issues later, it’s best to get your thoughts, and your emotions, in order first.
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Run Away
Anger is energy, and using it to run a few miles instead of letting it eat away at you makes it, and you, a lot more productive. Once you burn off the energy, you will feel a lot calmer.
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Take a Time-Out
They’re not just for kids. When you’ve had it up to “here,” go outside and take a breather until your frustration wanes.
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Take Back Your Power
If something is pissing you off, try putting your energy into finding a solution to the problem instead of letting anger tempt you to act out.
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Try Not to Turn up the Heat
When you have to tell someone why you’re mad, try saying, “It makes me upset when ___. How can we find a solution so we don’t have this tension?” Doing so instead of directly pointing fingers goes over much better. It sounds corny, but telling other people why you’re mad instead of why they’re wrong is the best way to get your feelings across without starting a fight (and make them more likely to address the problem).
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Practice Forgiveness
For you, not for them. Every time thinking about the situation makes you upset, remind yourself that you’re not going to let it affect you. Work on letting it go, even if you have to literally repeat “I won’t let their actions affect me” until what they did loses its power over you.
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Keep a Journal
Before you go off on whoever upset you, write them a letter in your journal. Get your frustration out on paper first and you can address the issue with a little less anger.
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Get a Stress Ball
Don’t underestimate the power of this little ball. It can help you reduce anger (especially if you squeeze it while repeating a mantra like “Relax, let it go”) and also help you sleep better and reduce your blood pressure.
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Have Chamomile Tea
When something has made you mad enough to keep you up at night, try chamomile tea. It will calm you down and help you get to sleep. Still, its gentle enough to put in your thermos during the day when you know a test is coming.
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Cut Down on Coffee
When a situation puts you on the emotional struggle bus, cutting your coffee intake can help. Caffeine gives you energy, but it can also fuel your anger. If you still need an energy boost, try a drink like black tea that will perk you up without exciting your nerves.
