Traits That Might Make You Unapproachable - Page 3
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You don’t look around
When you walk into a room, you don’t look around. You beeline it for the one person you know, or for the bar. This gives off the impression that you have no interest in surprise encounters.
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Or you look around too much
You can’t focus on the people with whom you’re talking. You always look around the room as if you’re looking for a more interesting conversation.
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You overdress
It’s wonderful that you know how to dress well! But if you wear a bandage dress and chandelier earrings to a hole-in-the-wall bar, people feel like you’re just waiting until you get to go somewhere better.
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You underdress
You’re comfortable in your sweat pants; that’s wonderful. However, they can give off the impression that you’re just waiting until you’re allowed to go home.
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You look suspicious a lot
Anytime somebody talks, you raise your eyebrows as if to say, “Is this person for real?”
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You check your phone or watch constantly
Nobody is going to approach you if they feel like you’re stressed about being somewhere else, or meeting someone else.
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You do all the talking
If somebody is watching you from across the room and realizes you do all of the talking–interrupting your friend anytime she tries to interject–they might see you as someone who bulldozes other people.
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You wear your professional clothes everywhere
You won’t take off your blazer, or swap your briefcase for a purse, even when you’re going to happy hour. It can make people feel like you’re all work and no fun.
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You bring your dog everywhere
Hey, who doesn’t love a cute dog?! But if you insist on bringing your registered therapy dog into every single bar, restaurant, coffee shop, and potential pick-up place, and have her sit on your lap, the pet can look like a boundary.
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You test people
You bring up awkward, personal or uncomfortable topics to see how people respond. Nobody likes to be tested; it makes the interaction feel inauthentic.
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You wear a lot of makeup
When it comes to makeup, to each their own but ideally you feel comfortable enough in your own skin to not have to wear layers of the stuff. It’s bad for your skin, it’s expensive, it’s time-consuming, and it can come off as an emotional boundary.
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You show your wealth
Brand names, giant designer bags, bottles of Grey Goose for the table…you earned this lifestyle, and you should get to enjoy it. Right? Yes, but it probably means that men who aren’t wealthy won’t talk to you. Even wealthy men might stay away, thinking that you cherish money too much.
