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If you’ve ever had the miserable experience of being diagnosed with an STD, then you’ve probably also had your doctor suggest that you call all of your past sexual partners and tell them. It’s the right thing to do, of course, but it’s also a very uncomfortable thing to do. When have you just felt like calling everybody you’ve slept with? There is usually a reason you stopped sleeping with them, and that reason can range from the fact that they were clingy, they were married and they were mean to petty things like they were bad in bed, or they were players. Regardless of the reason, most exes you call up won’t be happy to hear from you, and that’s before they even know the reason you’re calling. So brace yourself; here’s what to expect when telling your exes you have an STD.

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I wish it were a deadly one!

Then there will be those angry guys–the ones with the big egos who can’t believe you ever dumped them–who will declare that they wish you had a deadly STD.

 

 

 

 

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

“I knew you’d call…”

Mister Egomaniac strikes again. The one who thinks he is so good in bed, that he knew you’d be back for more. Nope: you’re back to report blood test results.

 

 

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Mr. Me too

Some men might report that they, too, have the STD. Who knows if you gave it to them, or they gave it to you, but they see this as a chance for the two of you to get laid right now, without worrying about infecting somebody.

Image Source: Shutterstock

Image Source: Shutterstock

Oh, I’ve had these symptoms…

A lot of guys don’t like going to the doctor, so they’ll use you as a doctor. They’ll list every physical sensation they’ve had in the last six months, from gas to graying hair, and ask if it could be the STD.