19 Signs You’re Having A Quarter-Life Crisis - Page 9

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Quarter life-crises; they’re real. Women in their forties or fifties who are reading this might scoff, but you know you were there too. When you hit your late twenties and early thirties, something shifts. During years 18 to 22, you’re immersed in college, distracted daily by parties and new knowledge and quirky friends. Years 22 to 24-26ish still carry that, “Wooh! I’m a grown up! I pay my bills” euphoria. But shortly after that, you realize your window of time to celebrate those accomplishments has closed, and if you don’t have something else to celebrate then…what do you have? If any of these thoughts are resonating with you, you may be going through your own quarter-life crisis. Here are 20 more signs.

 “For sale” signs frustrate you

“For sale” signs on houses used to do nothing for you. You felt so far from a time in your life when those signs should mean anything for you. It was all “For rent” for you. Now you’re thinking, “That sign should mean something to me, and it doesn’t, and that’s sad.”

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You think you need therapy, maybe?

You can’t pinpoint any real problem. Your job is going fine. Maybe you’re even in a stable, loving relationship. You have good friendships. But you think you might need a therapist because you feel like you’re free falling.

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 You’re secretly researching wrinkle cream

You’re just “window shopping” online, but you’re looking. You’re reading the reviews of “toning” creams, and you’re trying to guess the age of “Chrissy” who gave it four stars.

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 Forever 21 is your dirty secret

When you go to Forever 21, you sort of wonder if the teenagers are laughing at you, and if the security is going to escort you out for being overage.

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 You just think about vacation ending

Before you can get too excited about a vacation, you just think about the day it ends. You imagine walking back into your apartment, sad that the trip is over, and you have to return to your real life.

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 At a bar, you wonder who is in denial

You can no longer be blissfully drunk at bars. Instead, you look around at people and wonder, “What’s his secret? Is she really happy? What’s their deal? Do they have fulfilling careers?”

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 Emo songs scare you now

You used to love listening to emotional songs. Now you know it’s because you had never actually experienced those emotions in life…until now. Now those songs scare you and you, turn them off.

You stare at 40-year-olds

You stare at 40-year-olds in awe, almost as if they’re exotic species, wondering, “Are they happy? How are they doing this? They’re just out here, 40, smiling like it’s nothing!”

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You wake up wondering if you’re happy

Each morning, the first thought that enters your mind when you wake up is, “Will I feel like myself again today?”

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 You worry about a wasted night

Before going anywhere, you need a lot of details. Nights that go off the rails and end up at Taco Bell are no longer “Funny.” They are a waste of a good night’s sleep and a good makeup job.

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You think you’re chronically ill

Anytime something itches or hurts or gets hot, you go on WebMD. It’s occurring to you that you’re no longer so young that it’s “Probably nothing.”

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Your bank account embarrasses you

You used to think your itty, bitty bank account was funny. Now it angers you. Now when you look at it, you yell out, “You’re a grown woman!”

Young, happy girls annoy you

You don’t mean to do it, but when you look at a group of 19-year-old girls in their rompers, TEXTING, you get a disgusted look on your face.

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 Your medicine cabinet terrifies you

It’s no longer all blush and floss. Now there are prescriptions and things with words like “Constipation” and “Heartburn.”

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 Spammy emails spike your interest

Those spammy emails that open with questions like, “Do you feel lost?” and “Are you looking for a purpose?” keep your interest longer than usual.

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 You’re suddenly very into “healing.”

Hot yoga, regular yoga, meditation, focused meditation, chakra healing—you’re into it all.

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 New groups of people make you nervous

A party full of people you don’t know is no longer exciting—it’s a room full of people who might offend you or piss you off or hurt your feelings.

You’re considering a sugar daddy situation

Those girls on Instagram, who are always on yachts with champagne (and much older, much less attractive men)…they look happy, kind of? This is your last chance before 30.