The Dos And Don’ts Of Dating Someone With Social Anxiety
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Social anxiety can be crippling. You’re anxious. You can’t trust your thoughts. You misinterpret everything. You read into something when there is nothing. And while it’s crippling for the person who has it, it’s also a struggle for those who try to have relationships with someone with social anxiety. So here are the dos and don’ts of dating someone who isn’t comfortable socially.
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Don’t tell him he’s “Just having anxiety.”
I’m sure you don’t like it when someone tells you you’re “Just on your period.” You get infuriated, right? It feels like that person is invalidating your feelings.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do gently suggest that he’s being unreasonable
That being said, people with social anxiety do need to be told—gently—when they’re reading too far into things. They do need to be calmed down.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t bring him around insensitive people
If you have a friend who can be a bit out there (but in a fun, lovable way), don’t bring your man around him. That situation is full of anxiety landmines for your partner.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do explain people’s personalities to him
If you have to bring your man around rude, cold or loud people, explain to him why that person is that way. Tell him where they’re coming from—and what their intentions are—so he’s less nervous around them.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t EVER joke about being angry
Don’t ever pretend to be mad. The moment your man with social anxiety thinks you might be even a little bit angry with him, he gets worked up.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do let him know when you are angry
If you are genuinely upset, though, tell your partner. Don’t just act cold and hope he’ll figure it out. He probably won’t.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t introduce him to all your friends at once
If you introduce him to more than one of your best friends at once, he’ll have anxiety wondering if he gave them each enough attention and said the right things.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do tell him your friends will love him
Before he meets anyone important to you, tell him how much they’ll love him and how much they will adore his sense of humor. Set him up to win. Send him into the situation with confidence—don’t ever let him feel like you’re worried about what impression he’ll make with your friends.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t text about anything complex
Keep text messages to things like, “Let’s meet at 6 p.m.” or “I miss you and just wanted to say hello!” Don’t text anything that could be misinterpreted because that probably will happen.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do text just to check in
If you know you won’t be able to call or text for a period that is much longer than usual, let him know in advance. That way he won’t go crazy wondering if he did something wrong.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t overbook him
People with social anxiety get exhausted by social situations so don’t overbook your man. Make sure he has plenty of down time.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do tell him how great he was in a social setting
Immediately after leaving a social setting, tell him how funny he was, or how much everybody loved his stories, etc. Quell any worrying he might be doing.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Don’t laugh at a new look he tries out
People with social anxiety usually identify a lot with their physical appearance. If your man tries a new haircut or style, don’t crack jokes about it or be overly critical if you’re not really feeling it.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
Do compliment him!
But do tell him how cute he is, how much you love his style, how great his haircut is and so on and so forth. Everybody loves that—social anxiety or not.
- Anita Baker To Embark On Nationwide Tour For The First Time Since 1995
- New TLC Show ‘Seeking Brother Husband’ Showcases Polyandrous Sisters
- Georgia Judge Prohibits Tiffany Haddish From Drinking And Ingesting Illegal Substances
- Tyler Perry And Byron Allen Are In Talks To Acquire BET From Paramount
- Wendy Williams’ Son Kevin Hunter Jr. Evicted From Miami Apartment
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