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If you have a friend who doesn’t share much personal information, it could be hard to figure out whether or not she is in a relationship that is making her miserable. But your friend may silently be begging for you to help her out! Here are 15 subtle signs of an unhappy couple.

Lots of apologizing…for each other

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Lots of apologizing…for each other

One person is always apologizing for the other’s behavior. They’re apologizing to a server for their partner’s rudeness, or apologizing to a parent for their partner being so abrasive. They’re apologizing for exposing anyone else to the foolishness they have to put up with on a daily basis.

No knowledge of the other’s schedule

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No knowledge of the other’s schedule

It’s a little weird if your friend has no idea whether or not her partner will be available for a dinner some evening in December. She can’t tell you anything about one night out of four weeks worth of them? She and her partner probably don’t hang out or coordinate schedules enough.

Lots of talk about moving away/new adventures

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Lots of talk about moving away/new adventures

If your friend has been in a long-term relationship and is talking about how nice it would be to move to another country, travel the world or volunteer on another continent alone, it doesn’t exactly sound like she’s thinking of settling down with her partner.

Blaming the other person

Young Afro American couple having a quarrel in kitchen. Girl is scolding

Blaming the other person

Happy couples don’t blame one another for things that go wrong. If your friend goes on and on about how much her partner screwed something up, she can’t love him that much. When you love someone, you see and respect their good intentions.