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It’s not easy to be a guy. Women can be wary of even the nicest of men. But for that reason, fellas, you need to know that these moves—the ones you don’t think are aggressive—are freaking your date out. Even if you’re looking for a serious relationship, making these first date mistakes can make you seem sleazy and super suspect.

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And you point them out a lot

But you don’t stop. You mention her looks throughout the date. You’re trying to flatter her, but you interrupt her stories to mention how attractive she is. You make her feel like you’re only interested in her looks and taking her home.

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Getting the server on your side

The server compliments you or says that you’re polite, and you take the opportunity to say to your date, “See…our server thinks I’m good news.” Your date wasn’t doubting that, but now that you’re fishing for compliments, she is.