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Ever since K Michelle made her initial claims that producer Memphitz physically abused her, we wanted to know who this guy was. And it turns out, not only was he still involved in the industry, he was romantically linked–and then married to another recognizable name and face, Toya Wright.
And while both Memphitz, Toya and even some of their friends have always vehemently denied that he abused K. Michelle, the association alone took a great toll on Memphitz’s career and ultimately his marriage to Toya. Essentially, she believes it’s the reason they are separated today. And in a recent interview with Necole Bitchie, she explained what all of this did to Memphis mentally and how it hurt their marriage.
The current status of their relationship:
The current status of me and my husband [is] we are separated at the moment. And, we’re just- everybody has their marital issues. And right now, you know, we’re separated.
I mean, what is going on with my husband, like I said when I spoke on it, is bigger than me. Micky has been going through something for the last few years since the whole lawsuit thing against his ex [K. Michelle] and Viacom and it really took a toll on him and it caused him to be a different person. So I think that, going through all of those things, and having all of that stress and the world looking at you one way as a “woman beater” and person that steals someone’s money. It’s hard for you to get back into your industry when you had a career and not a [just] job and somebody defames your character. I mean, it’s a lot to deal with day to day.
And I watched it. I went through it with him for three years. And I’ve been to counseling with him and all types of things so he can get back strong. It’s a lot for him that’s on him and choosing to live our marriage publicly. Everybody has an opinion and when somebody has the bigger platform to share their story and the other person doesn’t, it kind of gets one sided.
And for him- I always get upset when he reacts out of anger on social media because I know that’s not really him and that it’s coming from a bitter, angry place because the world has turned him into that person, constantly accusing him of doing this and doing that and he’s constantly struggling to get back to what he had.
On fighting for her Marriage
When I met him, he had a career. He was a self made guy with his own. And then to fall back into my shadow and then to be known as a “woman beater” it’s kind of a lot.
I’m just praying for him and praying for our situation. I’m a person that is all about love and our family and I don’t like to give up. Especially being married two times. I don’t even like to go through the whole dating stage and all of that. I love my husband and I’m praying that we can get through this and he can get back right to the person that I met because he’s not the person that I met. This whole situation has changed him into someone else.
Where his resentment toward her came from…
You know he started to blame me, for- you know- he had the opportunity when it first happened to go on the show and um-
Love and Hip Hop. He wanted me to go on the show with him. Well, the producer wanted me on the show but that’s not really my thing and I was like ‘No, we’re newlyweds. And we have kids.’
That show don’t really represent what I represent as a woman. I was like, ‘Na, I don’t want to do that,’ because it’s so much drama. Not that I have anything against it, it’s just not for me.
So, he felt like, it was my fault that he didn’t go on the show and he had the opportunity to defend himself. We took another route and that route caused him to get blackballed in the industry and he kind of blames me for that and I have to deal with that everyday.
At that point, we had just got married. And to go on a show and argue with your ex, even for me to be put in that situation, I just felt like it was too much. I was totally against that and he just felt like, this was the opportunity for him to defend himself and was like, ‘No, I don’t think so. If this is not true, then you should handle it accordingly.
If someone is defaming your character, you gotta sue them or do what you gotta do. Especially after you ask them not to mention your name or likeness and they did it anyway, and it’s like [the show] lead people- even if they didn’t say your name- it lead people to my [husband] and… he started to resent me for that.
At the end of the day, I can’t go against what I believe in. That’s not something I was cool with. I don’t want my husband on a tv show, going back and forth with his ex, [while] we’re trying to move forward. You’re in another relationship, that’s your past.
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His odd social media presence these days
I had to tell him, like, that saying: ‘Half of the people are not what they ‘post’ to be,’ like people ‘post’ stuff on Instagram but it’s not really their life- like people don’t know the you that we know, the people that really know you. So when you get on there and you say crazy stuff and you act out of emotion and your feelings, people can take that wrong. I understand where it’s coming from, it’s coming from a place of you being hurt and angry and you’re just mad but you can’t put that out there. There is a better way of doing it.
I mean- everybody has their breaking point. Imagine if, people just keep attacking you and labeling you as something that you’re not, it comes to a point where you’re just, everybody explodes and they have their breaking point.
I just told him, ‘Maybe you need to delete social media because that’s not you. That’s really not you.’ Don’t stoop to the next person’s level.
His posts about K. Michelle
I don’t like it. I don’t like it at all. But when he does entertain it, it’s because it came to him first. The reason the last whole Instagram thing went on is because of what she said on Wendy Williams, you know what I mean? When she uses her bigger platform to attack him, it draws people back to him to pick on him. And that’s what makes him start to say stuff and post all this crazy stuff because that’s the only platform to defend himself.
It’s tough not to react, because we’re all human.
On Memphitz being her soul mate and whether or not she believed the abuse allegations
He’s always been a positive person, he’s a good father to his kids. My daughter loves him to death, like, he’s bubbly, he’s always- it’s like we balance each other out. He brings out the best in me, I bring out the best in him. I just feel like, you know, when I met him, he was my soul mate. [Before him] I’d always be like ‘I’m not doing that,’ [but] he’s adventurous. He exposed me to things I never saw. It’s a lot of things and he’s just overall a good man.
I wasn’t there [in his last relationship] so true- I can’t voice my opinion on what’s true. All I know is to go off what I know from the court stuff, what he told me and who he is to me and the other people that he has dated. Like, I met a lot of the women my husband dated and they all describe the same person [I know], so it’s just weird that he turned into a ‘woman beater’ overnight.
He doesn’t even like to argue with me. He’s the type of person when you’re having an argument, he’s dipping. He’s that guy. He don’t even like confrontation. So it was just weird to me or whatever. But like, I said, some women bring out the worst in men. So I can’t say what happened for real. All I can go off of is what I know and what I see and what I hear throughout the court documents and the court process that I witness with my own two eyes and it just wasn’t added up. But, that’s neither here nor there. All I can talk about is how he treats me and make me feel and this whole situation that’s going on right now.
I [tell him] ‘You can’t let this break you like this. You’re stronger than this, you’re better than this, you gotta bounce back. Don’t let this tear you down and turn you into someone that you’re not. Don’t let the world make you bitter. Be the Mickey we all know and love.’
Whoa. These two are dealing with a lot these days. But their issues, aside from the public being involved, aren’t entirely different from the ones non-famous couples experience everyday. The shift in roles and financial capabilities will have a lot of men shook, particularly when their name is being dragged across the media. While none of us know exactly what happened with K. Michelle, we wish the best for Memphitz and Toya, whatever that may ultimately look like.
You can read Toya’s full interview, where she talks about side chicks and what she’s learned about marriage here.
