10 Ways To Cope With A Partner That Can’t Find A Good Job

Don’t nag

Nagging never helps when your partner is trying to find a job. There’s only so much complaining a person can hear before they become unnerved. Rather than whining about the situation channel your energy into constructive actions that will help your partner find a decent job.

Respect their ego

When your partner goes through a long job search their self confidence is already wavering. Don’t destroy it further by making them feel guilty that their career is at a dead end. Their lack of confidence can show during the interview process and it may hurt their chances of getting hired. Instead build them up and cheer them on. Everyone needs a nice ego boost during a job hunt.

Encourage them to take breaks

You shouldn’t expect that your partner spends every single evening applying to jobs. Why? They’ll get burnt out. And applying for a good position isn’t a numbers game. If you send out hundreds of mediocre cover letters and resumes you’re not guaranteed any bites. Help them choose the positions that are best suited to their skills and don’t get antsy if they take a break from applying to enjoy their hobbies.

Remember it’s not always their fault

When the job search is slow going you may start feeling resentful because their career isn’t living up to your expectations. Be careful. There are many factors other than skill that can cause someone to have trouble finding a job.

How is the job market in your area? Is there high competition in your partner’s field? Think logically of ways to overcome these barriers rather than placing blame solely on your partner.

Motivate positively

Have you ever negatively motivated your partner? Negative motivation is when you take something away when a goal isn’t reached. The silent treatment is one form of negative motivation. This will hurt your relationship more than help it. Give positive motivation instead of hoping your negative response will spark a change.

Help them with applications.

You have a decent job, so you probably know how to write a great resume and cover letter. Offer to help your partner, but remember to avoid micromanaging. Review their documents before they send them off. A few tweaks here and there may improve their chances of getting resume hits.

Don’t force someone to be ambitious

If you’re an exceedingly driven women you may have to accept that you’re partner is less driven. Not everyone’s born with ambition. And that’s not saying you have to settle with someone who can’t provide for you or can’t contribute to your household. You can still be happy in a relationship with a partner who doesn’t aspire to become a CEO. Try not to pressure a change before they’re ready.

Keep the situation at home

You may feel the urge to discuss your partner’s career frustrations with close friends or family. It’s hardly ever a good idea. This fleeting moment in your partner’s professional history can affect your confidant’s overall opinion of them. If you need to vent, write it down on paper or have a conversation directly with your partner.

Be patient

Things happen in due time. You had to patiently send out job applications to gain success within your career and your partner will have to do the same. Don’t let the job hunt consume your relationship. Take time to enjoy each other while hitting the pavement and searching for the ideal position for your partner.

Understand it’s just a blip

While your partner searches for a job it’ll feel like an eternity. But then when you look back and things have come full circle it’ll feel like a short moment in time. Try not to base your entire view of your partner’s professional capabilities on their struggle to level-up (unless they’ve shown some other qualities you consider deal breakers).