10 Signs Your Relationship is Money Messy - MadameNoire

Not all relationships are healthy ones. Whether it’s a love interest or a friendship, at some point, you need to reassess the people you keep in your inner circle. Sure we all bring different things to the table, but please be careful that you aren’t being hit where it hurts. Here are a some signs your relationship is not healthy in the financial department. Unfortunately, this happens all the time.

You always pick up the check

Unless you’re trying to be chivalrous, why are you always the one paying for dinner? It should be assumed at some point folks will pay–or at least chip in with the tip. There are friends notorious for doing this in a group outing which simply is not fair. Even if you make a little more than your love interest or buddy, does that mean you foot the bill all the time?

They buy things on your dime

You have to be real close with someone to be able to purchase things at their expense. If you’re comfortable with people having access to your bank-related information, you need to check statements to make sure they aren’t enjoying the fruits of your labor. There are some people who have no shame charging items to your credit card, or asking if you can buy an item for them at checkout.

Know your business but won’t disclose theirs

Don’t be so willing to let people know your business when it comes to what you make and how often. Granted this isn’t necessarily a red flag, you might want to take note of folks in your camp who interrogate you for answers, but won’t disclose any of their own. It could come back to bite you in the butt.

Guilt you into helping them

“You can never understand my situation and don’t have it as hard as I do.”

Friends and lovers will naturally want to help each other out as they hate to see people the love suffer. That doesn’t mean you take advantage of the situation by making someone feel guilty to give you what you want. “If I made what you make, I wouldn’t be in my situation.”

Constantly borrow money

If you’re giving money to someone on the regular, you have now become their second source of income. At what point will you make the decision to cut off funding so they can learn to do for themselves? Don’t get it twisted, we all can experience life struggles where we need the assistance of others. That, however, does not justify someone constantly borrowing money from you.

Never repay borrowed money

How would you feel if someone who always borrowed money from you never repaid you, and had no problem purchasing nice items for themselves?

Probably upset.

It’s obvious your relationship is one-sided if someone borrows money and has no issue with not paying you back if they’re unable).

Make excuses for shortcomings

“I know I have a problem with money, but that is just how I am.”

You might want to let this marinate in your mind for a minute before you walk down the aisle with someone who has this mentality. Sure personal finances might not be your strong suit, but that doesn’t mean you throw your hands up and not make the necessary changes for the sake of your family.

Read Money Questions to Ask Before You Marry

Call you for emergencies

You might want to think about adding some distance between yourself and the person who always calls you whenever they find themselves in a financial emergency. While single and very rare events are understandable, do you think your relationship is really healthy if they’re always dialing you up for last-minute rent money because they are evicted? You have practically been forced into a position to say yes.

Always expect you to help them

When folks get super comfortable in their friendships or relationships, they tend to show you who they really are. People who have no issue asking you for money–or expecting you to help them if and when they’re in a bind–are very bold to say the least.

Care less about your situation

My how things can quickly be about one person and not anyone else and their needs. People who get into bad situations and ask you to bail them out don’t exactly have your best interest at heart. They will keep on borrowing with no care about what happens behind the scenes so long as their needs are met.