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Negotiating for your salary is not rude. Let those words sink in. The greatest hindrance to negotiating is the belief that you aren’t supposed to or that you’ll look greedy. This is especially important for women who are four to eight times less likely than men to negotiate salary. Let these “Dos” and “Don’ts” get you negotiating a better salary this time around.
DO…
KNOW WHAT YOU WANT
The first step to negotiating properly is knowing the salaries for comparable positions. If you haven’t done this before getting the job, don’t worry, it’s possible to state how “thrilled” you are that the company wants to hire you and ask for a “little time” before accepting the offer. Take a step back before asking for what you want. Hit the internet (Salary.com, CareerBliss.com and PayScale.com) and discover how much the company pays for the position. Draw up a list of the things that matter to you including base salary, bonus, 401(k) match, and more. Once you have all your priorities in order you’re in a better position to express them to your potential employer.
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START EASY
Don’t start negotiations by putting your employer on edge. Start easy: “When can I get into the 401(k) match?” This is a basic question with a clear, predetermined answer. You’re warming up your employer and easing into the questions that are most important. Throw out another easy question that keeps the conversation on the right foot. The third question can focus on what was placed on the top of your priority list. If it’s about your bonuses and its criteria, then ask for clarification on the issue. From there, alternate between a tough and easy question. When you open the dialogue about your base pay, be firm in asking if your employer can do any better. Be sure to resell yourself by restating your experience and value to the company.
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EMBRACE SILENCE
Silence is an important negotiation tactic in that it puts the pressure on the other person to speak first. It’s not easy to master because we are often the ones who rush to fill the silence instead of forcing our potential employer to do so. Once you’ve asked for the salary you want, stop talking! Jumping to speak only reveals how nervous and uncertain you are about what you want. Remain silent and let your employer respond. If silence is used against you during the negotiations, accept the feelings of discomfort that may arise. Take three deep breathes before speaking to give yourself time to solidify what you really want to say.
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WAIT FOR THE MAGIC NUMBER
If salary is brought up during the first interview, redirect the conversation to your accomplishments and sidestep the issue. You want the company to need you before discussing what you need from them. Be sure you understand the position before talking money. Will you be required to do overtime, to travel, or utilize highly-specialized skills? To divert the conversation try saying, “I am interested in learning more about the requirements of the job before discussing salary.” If they keep pushing, ask what the company has budgeted for the position. This will provide you with a frame of reference. If the salary mentioned is below the minimum number you have in your head, let the company know it’s too low while not saying by how much.
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DON’T…
WALK IN UNPREPARED
Too many people rely on their potential employer to determine the fair compensation for the job, that’s a mistake. To have any chance of getting the results you want, you have to step into the room with an idea of what you want and what is fair. Know the facts and be able to speak intelligently about them. Be able to support and justify your desired pay. If you don’t believe you deserve the pay you’re looking for, your employer won’t either. Don’t start the interaction by launching into questions about salary and benefits. Show that you’re interested in the organization and the role you’ll play.
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BEAT AROUND THE BUSH
Women tend to be more indirect than men. Where a man might say, “I want more money,” a women might say, “I have a lot of expenses.” To get what you want speak up and be clear about what you need. Implying what you want allows your potential employer to ignore the underlying message. Instead of giving the employer an out, be explicit with your requirements and keep everything out in the open. Avoiding direct conversations only reveals your lack of confidence and let’s the employer know you don’t really believe you deserve what you’re asking for.
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FOLLOW THE LEADER
Women are more likely than men to take their cues from their employer. Don’t believe your employer’s attitude that they are the only one’s bringing something to the table. If you believe the hype then it’s easy to settle for a smaller salary. Instead of looking at how the position will advance your career, focus on how you will advance the company. When negotiating with a soft-style negotiator it can be easy to fall into the role of wanting to be polite and keeping the conversation light. No matter who you’re dealing with, keep your end game in mind. If you are more interested in how nice everyone in the room is being you’ll end up walking away with less. The bottom line is, this is still a negotiation.
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BE UNSURE OF THE SCRIPT
Negotiating is not easy. To gain confidence create a plan of attack for dealing with either a hard-style (someone with forbidding body language and a tendency to say “no”) or a soft-style negotiator (someone agreeable who tries to work with you). Practice each aspect of negotiating with a friend before heading in for the real deal.
BE OVER-EAGER
Beware of sounding and acting too eager from the first contact until the job is yours. If your attitude revolves around how “lucky” you are, you’ll never have the mental distance to stand firm on what you want. Most mistakes made in negotiating happen before the conversation even begins. By starting off the interactions eager to please, you set the tone for both parties involved.
