15 Celebrity Exes Who We Wish Would Write A Tell-All

There are a lot of celebrity exes holding on to some good tea. Angry ex-wife reality shows are cool and all, but we’re thirsty for a good old-fashioned tell-all. Nothing gets tea on the street like a jilted lover and a publishing deal. If we missed your favorite ex, let us know which tell-all you’re waiting for in the comments section.

Amber Rose

We know Amber Rose has a ridiculous amount of celebrity tea to spill. She dated Kanye West and Reggie Bush which is about as complicated as a love triangle can get when you throw in Kim K and those shenanigans. We think she should release her tell-all tea-spiller in three parts like “Lord of the Rings.”

Lyndell Locke

We’ve all regretted letting go of an ex. But nobody messed up worse than Lyndell Locke. Dude dated Beyonce for nine years. Then he messed it up by stepping out on the relationship just as Bey’s career was taking off. We’d pick up this sad tea-spiller every time we needed to feel just a little bit better about some of the mistakes we’ve made.

Ashanti

We just want to finally be let in on all the secrets. Ashanti and Nelly dated for nearly a decade without letting us in on any of the details. Now it’s all over and we’re still dying to know the answers. If you’ve been saving it all for a million-dollar book deal girl, now’s the time.

Kelis

Nas is a hot mess. We know Kelis was ma-ad when she heard “Bye Baby”. In his lyrical tea-spiller, Nas says that he broke up with Kelis because she was an “angry black woman.” I mean, sure he cheated with a string of popcorn groupies, but that shouldn’t have mattered because “here’s the keys to the newest truck”.

We guess that’s why he cut his pregnant wife off without a penny (at first) after she left. Life with Nas sounds like a full time job and we’d love to read every scandalous detail right from Kelis’ mouth.

Kim Porter

Speaking of hot messes…we all know that poor Kim Porter announced that she was pregnant with Diddy’s twins only to find out he was having another baby by another woman.

But we think that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Even Diddy’s stylist has a ton of dirt to dish. We want Kim to write down all of the dirty details of her relationship with Kind Diva. Did he make her walk to Brooklyn for cheesecake? Did he replace all the water in the taps with Ciroc? We need to know!

Shaniqua Tompkins

We can’t be the only ones dying to know what’s so dirty about the tea that she has to spill that 50 Cent basically had “Starter Wives” cancelled to keep her from speaking up. He can take away your TV deal but he can’t take away your keyboard, girl. Get typing and we’ll get reading.

Mayte Garcia

Prince is notoriously secretive. But the few details we’ve heard about his relationships are juicy. His ex Charlene Friend says he used to make her call him “Messiah” in bed. Carmen Electra says she had to sleep with her makeup on in case Prince came to visit her in bed. And those were just his jump offs.

Mayte met Prince when she was 15, married and divorced him. We’d pay $19.95 a copy to hear all the tea she has to spill on the world’s most eccentrically talented man.

Debbie Rowe

There’s so much that confuses us about Debbie’s relationship with Michael that we’d pre-order this book just to get straight on some of the details that just didn’t make sense.

Kim Mathers

We don’t know what it was like to be married to Eminem, but if the marriage was anything like the public fallout and relationship-inspired music, we’re ready to hear all of the dirty details.

Tameka Raymond

This is another relationship with a bunch of questions we want answered. When we found out that our biggest teen crush was marrying a woman 10-years older than him, we figured “well it must be love.” Now we’re not so sure that’s the case. These two have gone through one of the nastiest divorces in recent memory and we just want to know what happened. Is Tameka the crazy one? Or did living with Usher Raymond drive her over the edge?

Halle Berry

Every black woman who’s ever been in an interracial relationship wants to know how you miss the signs that your boyfriend is a terrible racist. We’d even read a few chapters on how her other relationships went terribly wrong (we’re looking at you Mr. Benet).

Torrei Hart

“I could go into detail about extra-marital affairs, and other problems that many American couples have, but I won’t. Some who’ve walked in these shoes would boast, ‘I’ve lived the Diary of a Mad Black Woman… almost scene by scene,’ but I won’t.”

Torrei Hart’s tell-all would read like the plot to “Waiting to Exhale.” She fell in love with Kevin Hart, got married with no pre-nup, and helped him build his empire while he told her to wait on hers.

Then, as soon as his career took off, he left her and their kids for a model. Somebody call Angela Bassett, we smell a movie deal.

Vanessa Bryant

Why did she stay, ya’ll?! Why did she stay? Even Kobe Bryant’s paycheck can’t be reason enough to suffer through years of infidelity and a rape trial. We need her tea-spilling tell-all to help us understand. But we might be waiting forever. The paparazzi has spotted the two kissing in public since they’re split. Vanessa might need one more ride on the crazy train before she’s ready to get off.

Marc Anthony

We just want to know what it was like to be married to the woman who demanded an all-white dressing room with white food and white furniture.

Siohvaughn Wade

We don’t know who’s crazy, Siohvaughn or Dwayne. We have a feeling that both of them are a little bit off. We’ve already seen her on Dr. Phil but that little bit of tea scared Dwayne so much that he handed over $5 million to keep her from talking. If Siohvaughn can find a loophole in her hush money, we’d love to hear more about what’s going on.