Things Men Think Are Turn-Ons But Aren’t - Page 10

We have all been there when, in the midst of the throes of passion, a guy will do something that will completely kill the mood and maybe even make us question the relationship altogether. Here’s 15 things men think are turn-ons but actually have the opposite effect:

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Licking Your Ear

Sometimes men can go overboard when it comes to 4play, specifically when it comes to licking. While kissing, particularly on the neck, men often travel up and when they get to the ear, sometimes their natural (but very wrong) instinct is start to lick the ear. Women despise that feeling left in the ear. A co-worker described it best when she told a guy, “Don’t put humidity in my ear.” Men, please keep your tongues and the humidity out of our ears.

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Toes

Men may brag on their tongue wielding abilities but getting licked in certain spots isn’t a turn-on for everybody. Nothing can deflate a woman’s mood more than when her guy starts heading down south and doesn’t stop until he reaches her feet. Here’s a newsflash gentlemen: we don’t like it when you suck on our toes like a popsicle on a hot, summer day. Especially when you try to kiss us with that same mouth. Getting freaky doesn’t always mean everything ends up in the mouth.

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Pulling Your Hair Too Hard

Most of us don’t mind when things get a little rough in the bedroom but when it comes to our hair, pulling too hard is off limits. A grab is okay but when the guy wraps all of the hair around his wrist and plays tug of war, things have gone too far. Regardless if the hair is real or not, it is still attached to a real scalp. Bedroom hair is only acceptable in the bedroom or at a trendy club late at night, not when we have to return to work after a quickie during lunch.

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Corny Dirty Talk

Dirty talk can turn a woman on when done right but if the guy says the wrong thing, he can change the mood in the bedroom instantly. Have you ever had a guy whisper something so corny in your ear that you couldn’t help but to laugh right in his face? Men, if you’re not savvy with bedroom talk, forget speaking altogether and focus of body language because saying the wrong thing is a distraction. You can say a lot more with two lips and two hands, anyway.

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Spanking Too Hard

What is with the fascination with spanking too hard? Too often men go overboard with the “laying of the hands” and leave multiple red hand marks on butt cheeks. Women may like things to get a little rough but when it stops being sexual and starts to feel like been disciplined, spanking is no longer fun for us.

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Not Being Aggressive Enough

Some men think that women don’t want to be dominated so they become submissive in the bedroom, but the truth is most women want a MAN. Men are supposed to take control of the situation, as long as he is tending to his woman’s needs and not being overly forceful or aggressive. Women would prefer not to be with a man who is unsure of what to do or too afraid to try new things. Uncertainty in a man in an unattractive quality.

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Hickeys

Back in the day, we secretly wore hickeys on our necks with pride up and down the school halls as we tried to hide them from our parents, but after a certain age, walking around with a dark, purplish bruise on the side of our necks gets a little childish. Leaving “love marks” may be cute for teenagers but most adults would cringe at the thought of showing up to the office with a hickey on their necks.

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Licking Your Face

There’s a difference between a man passionately showering his girlfriend’s with kisses and treating her face like a kitten does a bowl of milk. Why do some men think women like having a wet tongue streak across our cheeks leaving a trail of saliva behind? Guys, our faces are not the envelopes that you have to lick to seal shut. Take a little time out and see just how your lady likes to be kissed and chances are it won’t be a lick across her face.

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Forcing You To Be Overly Flexible

Why do some men treat our bodies like the old Stretch Armstrong toys from back in the day? Yes, we do want to please our mates and go with the flow but sometimes guys expect women to be more flexible than what our bodies can physically allow. Not every woman was a gymnast growing up or can slide down into a perfect split at the drop of a dime. As much as we like to profess of our bedroom skills, some positions are uncomfortable, if not impossible, and should be left to the professionals. No woman wants to pull a muscle while trying to put her knee behind her head.

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Switching Positions Too Often

Sex between partners can be a learning experience in the beginning. The fun comes in exploring what the other person likes but some men can be overly zealous and do a bit too much. One minute, they have you facing this way and just when your body gets settled into the position and you get into it, he twists and turns you like a pretzel and now you’ve back at square one. There’s nothing worse than your partner stopping the action to shift into yet another position just as you see the finish line.

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Bad Grooming

Men, please do us a favor: you know when you’re going to want to try to get some so before you actually set out to put the plan in motion, take care of your personal hygiene first. Fresh breath shouldn’t be the only thing on the check-list. This goes a little beyond just taking the usual shower to start the day. In addition to the extra scrubbing in the hard to reach places, a little manscaping would also be appreciated. We’re not asking for a full on body wax but if you’re hairier than the average male, mowing down the hedges in certain areas would make the area more appealing and inviting.

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Overly Drunk

We all love to be wined and dined by our men because we like to be spoiled and they like what happens when the night is over but when the guy has had a bit too much wining, it can ruin the night. There’s nothing less attractive than being out on a night on the town with your man and he’s stumbling and slurring because he can’t hold his liquor. What’s worse is when he tries to drunkenly paw at us in a half-heartedly attempt of 4play.

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Bragging Too Much

Sure, we like a confident man that is sure of himself but being overly confident in the bedroom is can be very risky. It’s okay to talk a good game just as long as it is backed up by action. When a man makes a promise to his date is in for the night of her life and keeps stresses that, then expectations are set. If by the end of the night, she’s wide awake while he is curled up and conked out on the bed, he fell far short of his promises. Chances are she won’t fall for the big talk again.

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Bringing Food Into The Bedroom

Chocolate is one of nature’s strongest aphrodisiacs but just because it can turn us on does not mean we want to bring a buffet into the bedroom. Adding a little chocolate syrup or even whipped cream can make the kisses extra sweet but when solid foods are introduced, things can get messy. Including the sheets. Save the snacking for after the sex.