Aural Arousal: The Art of Phone Sex! Do You Have The Power Of…The Voice?

We’d all like to think that our game is tight when it comes to sex, but if you had to really think about it, are there any areas that could use improvement?

For example, my phone sex skills might be a little rusty. Okay, forget rusty…try non-existent. I’ve had men tell me that I have a nice, even sensual, voice, but I’m no Girl 6. I feel like the man has to really bring it out of me in order for me to go there. I usually feel silly if a sex call is initiated by someone else and if you catch me off guard, I might even start giggling. I’m just not an sensual chatterbox. I used to think phone sex was limited to those who were in long distance relationships or who were celibate and needed a release. But it shouldn’t be limited to those extreme circumstances; phone sex should be spontaneous and fun, not a daunting task or obligation.

If the thought of having phone sex has you a bit freaked out but you still want to give it a go, there are some things you can try to make it more enjoyable. Since I’m no expert, I decided to take some initiative and research ways I could improve my dirty talk skills if the occasion for me to use them ever…uh…”arises.”  Here we go.

1. Fake It

The last time I engaged in a little dirty talk, I was laying on my couch in kitty cat pajamas and fuzzy slippers with a scarf on my head. But in his mind, I was laying on the bed with satin sheets and nothing on but stilettos. I think the fuzzy slippers made me a little too relaxed and that may have been why I wasn’t too good at it. So nix the bear slipped, but make sure you’re comfortable while you’re turning him on; it’ll help you relax and he never has to know.

2. Set the Mood 

Now if you’re just not that good at faking it, you’ll have to truly set the scene if you’re going to be successful. If he calls out the blue, you might not have time to yank the curlers out of your hair and spray perfume on your body; but if you’re planning a sex talk session, then set the mood by taking a nice, long hot bath. Oil yourself down, put on some lingerie and light some candles. Dim the lights and pick up the phone. It’s probably easier to talk like a sex kitten when you feel like a sex kitten.

3. Be Descriptive

I find that men like to know how turned on you are: hot, body aching, heart beating, throbbing, etc. These are the type of words that’ll get him going, so break out the thesaurus if you have to! One should never run out of adjectives and adverbs during phone sex.

4. Use Props

Okay, so you don’t know how to describe oral sex. Well, instead of imagining yourself licking him, go in the freezer and get a popsicle or an ice cream cone, start licking or eating it…and then describe that. Props can help give your imagination a boost.

5. Get Turned On

Say the use of props isn’t giving you the same “sensation.” If you’re not really feeling it, grab your trusty B.O.B out the nightstand drawer and GET TURNED ON. You can always use it before you make the call to get you in the mood or if you feel self conscious about it. No toys? Well try adult videos. Put it on and watch it while you’re talking to him and describe what you see. No imagination necessary.

6. Simply Ask Him What He Wants

If you don’t feel like setting the mood, just ask questions to see what state he’s in and ask him what he wants. “Do you wanna squeeze my ________, baby” and make him answer you. Sometimes it’s just easier to ask him what he wants and then just say it or repeat it than to come up with something clever on your own.

7. Speak Clearly

When you’re uttering the world’s filthiest words, don’t be lazy – make sure he can hear you and speak clearly with emphasis and enthusiasm!  You’d be surprised how seductive ‘k’ and ‘c’ noises are, so make sure you enunciate.

8. Sell It!

Since you are not physically with him, you’ll need to be convincing and play to his state of arousal since there is no direct stimulation. This is where you need to truly take control of mind, not just his body. When he’s excited, you are the only person in that moment who has the power to satisfy him and his desires, so own it and sell it! Just having that sense of power can make any woman feel hot. Make him a slave to your voice!

9. Pay Attention to Him

You can’t be successful at phone sex if you’re not paying attention; otherwise, what’s the point? If his breathing starts to stagger, and you hear these weird sounds going on over there, keep going! Step it up, join in, climax with him! Get as excited as he is..and…wait for it…wait for it…ahhhh! Such a rewarding feeling! You did it!