With the news of Eva Longoria and Tony Parker’s divorce heating up the tabloids (even though their actual marriage was about as interesting as a can of Tab), rumor has it that the baller cheated on his wife with the wife of one of his teammates. Now, that’s putting the ‘T” in “trifling” right there, you won’t hear me contesting that. However, I do take issue with the fact the chorus of men who are moaning about the infidelity of the team player’s wife as if it’s somehow worse because she’s a woman. Does the fact that this to-be-named woman cheated on her husband with his colleague make it a more bitter pill to swallow? Oh, absolutely. But to act as if a woman’s infidelity is somehow worse because of her gender? I can’t. Here are a few things I submit for consideration when it comes to this whole cheating thing.
1) Bad For Goose, Bad For Gander: Cheating is a cruel and sometimes devastating violation of your partner’s trust. Most persons who are cheated on and who are made aware of such are hurt by it. However, though we may have been socialized to assume that “all” men cheat (which is simply not factual), that doesn’t somehow mean that a woman’s infidelity is extra damning because she’s violating some sort of social order. I’ve heard of cheating men who have been completely destroyed by their woman’s outside dealings-why? We can’t put women on the guillotine for infidelity, then turn around and act like cheating is ‘a man being a man’. This double standard doesn’t serve anyone and just reinforces some truly antiquated attitudes that hurt a lot of people.
2) Women Don’t Always Cheat To “Upgrade”: There is this notion that if a woman steps out, it’s because she is somehow lacking something emotional from her partner and she is in search of love and affection. This sounds great for a Harlequin novel, complete with a (replacement) Prince Charming rescuing the heroine from her tyrannical husband, but in reality, there are a lot of trifling women who will trade the integrity of their vows or their non-legally binding commitments for a few hours of passion with a hot young thing. Not so different from the other gender, no?
3) You Don’t Know Why Eva and Halle Got Played…Nor Will You: We can all sit at home and theorize about beautiful women being lazy in bed or not knowing what to do with a man’s body. We can decide that Tony Parker was too young to be married. We can even declare “That’s what she gets!” when we think back on Longoria’s admission that she lied to her grandmother about her then-fiancee Parker’s race. But at the end of the day, we don’t know these people or how they operate when cameras aren’t rolling. Thus, please tell your cousin Roscoe to stop guessing about some famous actress’ sex game when he can’t even get the girl on the corner to join him for a chicken dinner.
4) Just Because A Celebrity Gets Cheated On, Doesn’t Mean You Will: People cite the fact that women like Miss Berry get cheated on as evidence that no woman can ever expect fidelity. All that means is that no woman is automatically immune, but it definitely doesn’t mean it’s guaranteed. Probable? Yes. Definite? Not at all.
