Brother, Get a Grip! 9 Signs Your Man Has Serious Insecurity Issues
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When you first meet a man who is attentive and loving, it can be easy to fall for him quickly – especially if the last relationship you were in was with a self-centered and arrogant type of man. While the new guy is appealing to you because he seems to want – even crave – your love and affection, you may not realize that his longing is steeped in insecurity rather than true love and devotion. An insecure man may be hard to spot at first because he appears sensitive and may even give you the impression that he feels you are too good for him. For some women, that’s flattering; but, that feeling of flattery can quickly spiral into a feeling of desperation or exhaustion. Insecure men can drain you of every drop of energy you have in order to make him feel safe and secure in your relationship. If you’re wondering if you man has insecurity issues, look for these signs to see if he may need to be prescribed a visit to a therapist.
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1. He’s Smothering
Most couples are usually joined at the hip when they first start dating; you know, the “honeymoon” phase. But if after maybe six months of dating he still can’t bear the thought of not being in the same room as you for more than five minutes, something is wrong. Most men who are smothering make sure to stay so close to you that no one else can get close to you either. If they can keep you in their sights at all times, they feel they can keep you out of the sight of another man as well. If he has to know where you are at all times and calls you a million times a day asking you what you’re doing, then not only is he insecure, you might have a stalker situation on your hands.
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Image Source: Bigstock.com
2. He Doesn’t Want You To Have Any Friends (Especially Male Friends)
Speaking of keeping folks away, most men who are insecure don’t want to share their women – with ANYONE – not even her female friends. Male friends? Out of the question. By having a life outside of him, you’re sending him a message that your life doesn’t revolve around him, and insecure people need to feel like the center of the universe in order to feel like they matter. If he’s always calling you when you’re out with your friends or trying to make you choose between spending time with him rather than spending time with your girls, then it might be time to call it quits because this is an unhealthy situation.
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- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
3. He’s Always Accusing You of Cheating
One of the most obvious signs that your man is insecure is that he’s distrustful of you. Does he constantly accuse you of flirting or cheating on him? Most likely it’s not because he really doesn’t trust you; rather, it’s likely because he doesn’t think he’s good enough for you and feels that you might discover that the grass is, indeed, greener on the other side. His feelings of low self-worth propel him to project his feelings of inadequacy onto you, therefore trying to guilt you into staying with him. Constantly asking you if you are lying or cheating on him is his way of demanding that you declare your faithfulness and affection for him on a regular basis because that is the only way he can build his self-esteem.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
4. He’s Jealous and Possessive
Even if he doesn’t accuse you of cheating, he may simply be so jealous that he has convinced himself that EVERY man on the planet wants you and so, he causes a scene wherever you go. Has he gone off on the waiter because he thought the server was flirting with you when in fact he was simply taking your order? Does he require that you not smile or say hello to the parking attendant or does he get angry when you’re interacting with co-workers of the opposite sex – even if it’s completely innocent? If he can’t control his jealous impulses to the point that it embarrasses you or you cringe at the thought of being out with him in public, you could be potentially putting yourself in a dangerous situation. This type of obsessive behavior can lead to verbal or physical abuse if he can’t control his temper and his behavior.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
5. He Fishes For Compliments
Is he always making self-deprecating comments like “I’m a loser” or “Why are you with me?,” only for you to remind him (again) of how great he is or that you’re with him because you love him and think he’s a wonderful guy? If so, he needs constant reassurance that he’s all the guy you imagine him to be and more. There is nothing wrong with biggin’ your man up in order to stroke his ego every once in a while, especially since women like to be complimented too. But you should augment his security, not provide it for him. If he looks to you to validate him and feels some kinda way if he doesn’t receive compliments from you all day every day, the man needs help.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
6. He Puts You Down
Sometimes, the only way people can feel good about themselves is if they put someone else down. If you find that your man is stingy with giving you compliments or finds a way to put you down or give backhanded compliments, then he’s trying to boost his own self esteem at your expense. This is a selfish, self-centered way for him to build self-worth because he’s willing to hurt you in the process. It could also be damaging to your self-esteem, so if you find yourself in this situation, you should leave for your own sake.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
7. He Wants You to Change Your Appearance
When you first met, he thought your makeup was flawless and that you were hot as hell. Now, he wants you to barely wear lip gloss and wear clothes that do nothing to accentuate your curvy shape. He feels that now that he’s “bagged” you, there’s no reason for you to put your assets on display for another man to notice, and that if you continue to get all dolled up, it must be because you’re still looking to attract other men. It never even crosses his mind that you’re trying to look good for him or, surprise, yourself. If he wants you to tone down your looks so that you’re not attractive to other men, he has major insecurity issues. A secure man would want you to look your best at all times, not just for him, but because it makes you feel good about yourself as well.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
8. He Always Tries to Break Up With You First
Some insecure men play this game where they are always threatening to end the relationship by saying such things as, “You should be with someone else” or “You don’t want me, I’m leaving.” He’s testing you to see if you love him enough to beg him to stay; if it backfires and you agree to the breakup, of course, he backpedals and takes it all back. This back and forth game that he’s playing with you basically comes down to one thing: he’s afraid of losing you – so much so that he feels it’ll hurt less if he breaks up with you first, on his own terms, even if that’s not really what he wants. It’s an act of desperation to test your love and loyalty, and if you “fail” the test, he can always say that you never loved him to begin with and use the breakup as a way to justify his insecurities.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
Image Source: Bigstock.com
9. He’s Co-Dependent
Ever feel like your man can’t function without you? That his moods, his feelings and how he feels about himself are all dependent on you? If you feel responsible for how he feels about himself, you are in a co-dependent situation and it will ultimately drain you and bring you down. It’s one thing to want to sympathize or empathize with how your man is feeling – there’s nothing wrong with that. But if he uses you as his mirror to reflect back to him feelings that he should have for himself, you will become exhausted because you can’t be responsible for you self worth and his too.
- Diddy’s Defense Admits Violence But Denies Sex Trafficking In Opening Statements
- Terrence Howard Bashed For Rejecting Marvin Gaye Biopic Over Gay Kiss Scene
- Wowzer! 10 Sex Games To Build Trust And Intimacy With Your Partner
- Why Women Get The ‘Ick’ More Than Men — It Might Just Prolong Their Lives
- Why Actress Amber Iman Calls ‘Goddess’ A Love Letter To Black Women In Theater [Exclusive]
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