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The notion of “good hair” is a misconception that dates back to the days of American slavery, when European culture and standards of beauty were used to disparage the self-esteem of Black women…ultimately causing divisiveness that has damaged our appreciation for what could be described as ‘black beauty.’ Naturally, some developed a desire to look like the white women in the main house—well-groomed and sweet-smelling with long, flowing straight locks. It was made clear that thick, coarse hair was undesirable and worth less.
Sadly, those beliefs stuck and we’ve carried them for centuries—making any and all efforts to adjust. We have found false beauty in assimilation, spending countless dollars on relaxers and weaves. All in an attempt to look more like the women who exemplify “American” beauty. It was in watching Chris Rock’s documentary Good Hair that I realized the desolation in the Black woman’s obsession with hair. Only one woman wore her natural hair, while the others bragged and boasted about their weaves—”pretty” girls like Meghan Good, Nia Long and Lauren London who attached being beautiful with long weaves. We are generations deep in a web of lies that have us spending money we don’t have and using toxic chemicals to attain an artificial sense of self-esteem.
It would be different if we loved our nappy roots and felt sexier wearing a ‘fro than an 18 inch sew-in, but that’s just not true. Black women are slaves to their relaxers and weaves. Blinded by self-deception, we actually believe we are expressing ourselves freely. True freedom is in happiness with yourself, weave or not. It’s appreciating your natural beauty first and accentuation to make your natural beauty pop. Often disgruntled by societal pressures to be something we are not, we cannot expect to receive a love for ourselves that we don’t dish out. These are five reasons more of us should give the weaves up…
1. Nappy hair is good hair
It’s not the texture of hair that determines whether it’s good or bad. All types of hair can look good if properly maintained. The key to having “good hair” is not as much genetic as it is knowing your hair type and what it needs to remain healthy.
2. A weave is not representative of who you are
I think Ms. India Arie said it best with her song “I Am Not My Hair.” Hair is not what defines your beauty, especially not straight hair. The hair from your weave is not yours and no real reflection of who you are.
3. Take the power from your haters
The beauty of Black women is debated and criticized more than any other group of women. We are constantly held to the standards set by other races. When we play into them, we give them power. We are just as beautiful as White, Latina and Asian women in our natural state. And the more Black women free themselves, the more apparent it will come to be.
4. Get out of bondage
The remnants of slavery have brainwashed us for too long. It’s time to be free and love who we are and what we see in the mirror, kinks and all. We don’t have to be slaves to the ideas of beauty derived from our White counterparts.
5. Build authentic self-esteem
Strip yourself of the extras, look in the mirror and start to love that person. What is real is raw. Learn to see that woman is beautiful.
