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You’ve been with your guy for about 6 months now, and you’ve even had the “boyfriend/girlfriend” talk (do people still do that?). Anyway, you think you know all there is to know about him – his mother’s maiden name, his likes and dislikes, his favorite cereal, etc. But men will never truly reveal everything to you, no matter how much he may like – or even love – you. It’s not that he’s keeping secrets or doesn’t trust you – it’s usually a case of him wanting to you to figure it out or just “know” him as time goes on. If you’re totally into him and care about him, there are some things you’ll just naturally pick up on; but if you have preconceived notions about your boo, you might not ever be able to understand him the way you possibly could. Whether it’s been months, or years, here are just a few things men won’t tell you – they just want you to “know.”
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1. He Cries
A man might not readily admit to this, but he has cried, and will probably cry again in the future. If you stay together long enough, and he truly loves you, you may actually witness it. No man wants this to happen – unless he cries on your wedding day or at the birth of a child. Otherwise, he tries to keep his frustration or pain to himself in order to appear more manly to you. Crying is usually associated with weakness or women and he always wants to be seen as “the man” in your relationship. If you are a woman who thinks that a man who cries is a punk, know that a man who allows the woman he loves to see him cry is actually displaying strength, not weakness. Crying doesn’t mean he’s a sissy, it means he’s human…just like you.
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2. He’s Been Hurt Before
Hopefully, when you met your man, he didn’t bring any baggage with him. This isn’t to say that he doesn’t have a past, but hopefully he’s emerged stronger and wiser as a result of past relationships and isn’t making you pay for someone else’s mistakes. But believe it or not, he’s probably been in love before you, has been hurt before you, may have been cheated on before you, and may have even been the one who cheated before he met you. These are things most men don’t divulge easily, but as your relationship progresses, he may open up and share some of these things with you. But if not, know that all men, like women, have a past love, a past hurt – a past period – and the hope is that he’s matured as a result of his experiences so that he is now that man that you’ve been looking for.
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3. He Wants You to LISTEN
We all know that most men can be emotionally unavailable and don’t open up as much as we’d like. But when a man falls in love, his partner should become his new best friend – and confidante. So when he finally opens up and begins to speak to you about his feelings, emotions or anything serious – LISTEN. This means give him your ear, not your opinion or advice. He’s not looking for that. He’s looking for his woman, the person he has decided to trust with his heart and be vulnerable with. You’ll never understand him if you never listen to him. If you mess this up by making fun of him, not allowing him to express himself or by simply brushing him off, he’ll never open up again.
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4. He Wants You to Make Him Better
When a man has decided to settle down, it’s usually a sign of maturity. He’s not as concerned with his boys, video games or chasing women for sport. Once a man realizes he has a gem of a woman, he [secretly] wants that woman to bring out the best in him. He’ll never admit that he could use your help or that he wants you to be his helpmate or his better half. He just simply expects the woman he loves to know this…and be his biggest cheerleader. Show him support and encourage him to reach his dreams; in return, he’ll try to give you the world.
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5. He Thinks You’re Crazy
Okay, he may not think you’re ape ish, straight jacket crazy, but most men think all women are crazy – and you are no exception. He just has decided to love you anyway. Women are emotional creatures, and to men, emotional = unstable = crazy. He just has made up his mind that you are probably the “most sane” woman he’ll ever meet and he’s fine with that. Men can really like, or even love, a woman he admires and respects…even if she’s a bit on the emotional side. He has accepted your craziness because it’s overshadowed by all of your wonderful qualities – and a man who loves you will overlook your minor flaws. I actually think a man likes a “little crazy” in his woman. It keeps things exciting.
6. He LIKES Being Your Man
Most women feel that men are players by nature, always looking for the next best thing and not wanting to settle down. And this is true for immature boys (or men) who aren’t ready to turn in their mack cards. But if your man has proclaimed his love for you and has made it known that he wants to be the only man in your life, trust me when I tell you nothing makes him feel like a king more than being able to be called your MAN. Whether he’s your boyfriend, your dude, your husband or your MAN – that title means the world to him. Don’t think that because he’s a man, he’s ready to bounce once another woman with a big butt and a smile passes by. He loves being in love just as much as you do…and being your man means even more.
