Source: The Is Your Conscience
Men have their radars too when it comes to women and dating. It might be embedded in their “guy code” or could be from personal experience, but when it comes to getting to know a woman, certain ‘red flags’ or warning signs alarm them of what they might be getting themselves into.
All of us have fallen for the exception to the rules and warning signs, and so have men, and the lesson and outcomes seem to be the same.
“I’ve dated women even after they’ve showed me these signs simply because there was something else about her that allowed me to look past them. But if we do end the relationship, and it ends up being because of red flags I noticed before, I end up being more disappointed in myself for not knowing better and not sticking to what I believe.”
Straight from the opinions of males (unidentified for privacy reasons), here are some red flags men take notice of while getting to know and dating a woman:
Source: Color Me Rouge
Too Much of a Good Thing
“I know some very attractive women that use make-up to make themselves look beautiful, but sometimes they wear way too much or don’t really need it at all. With make-up, less is more.”
For some men, too much make-up, weave, accessories or overly-done attire could be too much of a good thing. Although things like make-up and the physical appearance of a woman is supposed to enhance the features and personality, men are overwhelmed by the ones who go overboard with it, leading to questions of possible insecurity and what’s behind the appearance. One male describes his ideal date’s make-up, noting that ‘less is more.’
Source: Mused Mag Online
Overly Aggressive or Independent
As women in 2012, there is no surprise when we are called to take on multiple domineering roles like mother, supervisor and sometimes, main breadwinner. In the dating world though, we don’t necessarily have to take those traits with us, giving space for the man to be the man during the date. Being overly aggressive or independent could prove to be a distraction during the date. From a male’s perspective, independence is attractive, but too much dominance during a date becomes unappealing.
“There is nothing wrong with being independent and be able to do for yourself, however, don’t try to prove a point by doing little things to show your independence, like rejecting a drink. I literally witnessed a woman tell a man that she didn’t need him to buy her a drink because she got her own money and didn’t need his. His approach was smooth and he didn’t really say anything that I would find offensive, but she just went off on him. He kindly got up and left the area.”
Source: 123 RF
Lateness
“Excessive lateness without notice, just like on a job, is a sign of lack of respect. If she agrees to be somewhere at a certain time, I would expect that to happen but if she can’t, I expect some kind of notice.”
It’s only in our nature that we like to take our time getting ready. The right dress, shoes, make-up and attitude completes a look, and it’s a necessity to carefully get prepared. After about an hour or three, that necessity begins to turn into an impatient waiting game for your date, holding a reserved table for two, waiting for you in the car or constantly guessing if you’ll even show up. A warning or notice of your lateness, whether it’s legitimate or cosmetic, is always courteous.
Source: Madame Noire
Negative Language
“Language says a lot about a woman. I’m mindful if every other word out of a woman’s mouth is a curse word or bad language.”
Every other word on a date shouldn’t be expletives. Sometimes, we all have a “potty mouth,” but during a date, leave the cursing and negative language at home. It might not be the best representation of who you are as a woman if cursing or speaking negatively is the only way you can express yourself. Anyone on a date is aware of that, male or female.
Source: My Majic DC
Relationship Patterns
“I believe relationship patterns reveal the type of guys you are drawn to, what you value, what you expect and accept in relationships.”
Your relationship patterns could indicate certain traits about you that could wave a red flag in the air to anyone trying to take the date to another level and get to know you as relationship material. If you’re ex-boyfriend keeps coming into the conversation or every boyfriend you’ve dated has a bad reputation, to some men, this could be a warning sign to back-off.
Sex Too Soon?
Too many guys say the same thing about this one. If you give it up on the first date, you risk being seen as too easy of a conquest. That may be fine if you only want to date, but it may not be the best idea if you’re trying to get into a long-term relationship. If you give in to a guy’s advances too easy, he assumes that you are treating other guys the same way. How can he trust you to be his girlfriend if that’s the case and uphold a sense of loyalty. Obviously, there are always exceptions to the rule but it’s better to be safe than sorry.
Blair Bedford is a media professional and freelance writer/contributor based out of NYC. Follow Blair B. on Twitter @BlairsPadandPen.
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