Does it matter to a woman if the man she is dating is a virgin? Do women prefer men with some sexual experience, or are they willing to teach inexperienced men about sex?
These questions can be of concern for a number of men who are trying to regain, sustain, or maintain a life of purity. There is a concern because some women may view men who are virgins or practicing abstinence in a less than masculine light because men are expected to be sexually aggressive. The women may view them as men who are afraid of physical intimacy, impotent, homosexual, or men who have something to hide. Remember all the buzz and suspicions about brothers on the down-low?
With the possibility of these thoughts lingering in a woman’s mind, a man’s ego and confidence may suffer. On the other hand, there are many women who may not be alarmed about dating men who are virgins or practicing abstinence. These women may view men who are virgins or abstinent as men who are sexually responsible, disciplined, and have established standards that are set apart from societies sexual standards for men. In these cases, a man’s ego and confidence is reassured. In a brief case study, a number of women were asked to list the pros and cons of dating men who are virgins and men who are abstaining. The results on the following pages gave many pause as to what how important or unimportant sex was in a relationship.
The titillating truth of a male virgin a male virgin
Pro: Innocence and inexperience is a turn on!
Con: He’s inexperienced.
Pro: You can train him to meet your physical needs.
Con: He may not want to have sex with you.
Pro: He does not have any sexually transmitted diseases.
Pro: He doesn’t have any children (for women who don’t want a man with children).
Con: He may not want children (for women who have a child/children and have the desire to).
Pro: There is no pressure on you to have sex.
Con: There may be pressure on you to teach him.
Con: If he does want to have sex, there is a possibility of premature-ejaculation and no orgasm for you!
Pro: He is a man of discipline.
Con: He may be timid or shy during his first sexual experience.
Pro: He has morals, values and he practices them.
Pro: He’s saving himself for his wife!
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The fascinating facts of male abstinence
Pro: He’s experienced, yet disciplined.
Con: He may have a sexually transmitted disease.
Pro: He knows his way around a women’s body.
Con: He may not know his way around your body.
Pro: He may have children (for those women who don’t mind dating a man with a child/children).
Con: He may have children with several women who enjoy drama!
Pro: You build a better bond within the relationship because the relationship is not based on physical attraction.
Con: The temptation of having sex is still there.
Pro: He’s sexually responsible.
Pro: He has morals, values and practices them.
Con: The woman may want to have sex.
Whether dating a man who is a virgin or abstinent, applaud them for their efforts. In a society where sex is prevalent and where men are expected to be sexually aggressive, men who stand up and stand out as virgins or abstinent should be respected as well. A person’s sexual status should not matter in a relationship because sex should not be the center of a relationship. Right?
Liz Lampkin is the author of Are You a Reflection of the Man You Pray For? Follow her on Twitter @lizlampkin or visit her Website, www.reflectandgrow.com.
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