madamenoire.com
It’s a tricky thing: integrity in love. Love is certainly not black and white. As we get older, we learn what we do and don’t want in a partner. Sometimes, we learn it while in the relationship. You can’t help who you fall in love with, and you can’t help when you meet that person. Sometimes timing is just not right.
We all know stories of two people meeting, taking each other from their current relationships, getting married and living happily ever after. It happens. But, should it? If you’re considering leaving your current man for another, consider your reasons for doing so or you may just end up feeling massively guilty, and no happier than you were with the last guy…
Think on this before you do…
thenegroqueen.com
Could you be alone?
It’s one thing to just fall madly in love with someone while you’re with somebody else. It’s a whole different issue if you’re just terrified of being alone, and the guy you’re leaving your man for could be anyone. If you always line up your next relationship before the one you’re in even ends out of fear of being alone, see a therapist about codependency issues.
Has it been over for a while?
Sometimes, a relationship is still on but you’ve been checked out for months—even years, (i.e. you’re out of love) and for one reason or another haven’t ended it. If that is the case with your current man, and for reasons of comfort or not wanting to hurt him, you haven’t ended it, but then you met someone you fell for, then you probably aren’t the relationship addict described in the previous slide since, in your heart and head, you have been single for a long time. You felt alone and single but you just carried the title of “girlfriend.”
relationshipplaybook.com
Are you cheating?
It doesn’t matter if you plan on ending your relationship with your current man—nothing justifies cheating. If you’re so certain you will begin a relationship with the new man, then your current one shouldn’t pay the price for your cowardice because you’re too afraid to end it. If you want a new man, you need to pay the price of hurting the current one—but in an honest, straight forward, “we are breaking up” manner.
madamenoire.com
Did the new one talk you into it?
Sorry but, no respectable man asks a woman to leave her current man for him. I don’t care how sweet, wonderful and perfect he is for you. He is massively imperfect in an important way if he lacks so much integrity as to consciously step in the way of someone’s relationship.
hellobeautiful.com
Are you just insecure?
Everyone is exciting when they are new. Perhaps, your man has become busy with work, or preoccupied with a major stress or tragedy in his life and he isn’t paying as much attention to you as he used to. Or, maybe, you’re just insecure and you need to feel super exciting to someone all the time—something that just fades after a while in a relationship. If that’s the case, then of course you’re going to like the attention of another man—one who you are new and exciting too—and might consider leaving your current one for him. But guess what? The excitement will fade there too. And you need to work on being secure enough to accept that relationships just become more balanced over time—that the mania doesn’t last forever.
blackloveandmarriage.com
Is your current relationship bad?
Are you fighting a lot? Is someone abusive? If so, your perspective on a new man is jaded. Anyone looks good in comparison. You’re looking for a savior but, a couple of things: 1) You definitely need time to heal after an abusive relationship—perhaps make sure you are not attracted to toxic relationships and 2) You only like the new guy because he is not the old one. But you don’t like him for who he is.
