Insights from Stephan Labossiere: The Reality of Potential in Relationships

Tonight’s Conversation, a live podcast that centers around conversations of Black love, dating, and interpersonal relationships, posted a short clip of a recent show on their social media on April 3. In it, relationship and certified dating coach Stephan Labossiere gave some advice and insight for women entering into relationships with partners that they see “potential” in. 

Labossiere began on the Live & Uncut stage by introducing a saying to the audience: “Men marry, hoping the woman will never change. Women marry hoping the man will change.”

He continued to tell the audience, “So a lot of women get with the man who has what she considers untapped potential, but sometimes potential is a figment of your imagination. What you see is not what he has in him or might not even want for himself.” 

In the clip, as the crowd cheered, Labossiere explained to the women in the audience that sometimes, the desire to want their partner to reach their perceived potential is actually wanting them to “be someone they’re not.” 

These unrealistic expectations are a common culprit for why some relationships fall apart eventually.

Labossiere gave a piece of advice: before going into a relationship, you “have to be honest about it’s even something [you] can walk into and grow into or this is just who [you are.]”

Labossiere added that the best thing is to be on the same page and acknowledge if it’s best to go your separate ways before committing to something that may be unrealistic. 

Tonight’s Conversation features guests who host live talks and round-table discussions every Tuesday and Thursday about love and how it is uniquely influenced by Black culture. The guests also give advice to the audience on how to navigate the dating sphere.