As women we have it somewhat easier than the guys when it comes to the delicate subtleties of the dating world. While we undoubtedly go through our fair share of drama, I can’t help but feel like men are put at a disadvantage from the start. I mean it has to take a lot of guts to approach a woman, a complete stranger, trying to convince her she should get to know you better. As someone who doesn’t take kindly to rejection, that’s not a job I’d want…at all. While we women must show discernment when deciding who we’ll dedicate our time to, we shouldn’t eliminate potential suitors for no good reason. Many of us, not all but enough of us, have such shallow, downright frivolous criterion for even engaging in conversation with a man, that it needs to be addressed. Are you one of these women? Well, do you subscribe to one of these schools of thought?
1. He Doesn’t Drive the Right Car
Lord knows I’m so tired of women turning their noses up at men who don’t drive a Benz or Jaguar or some other type of luxury vehicle. At the end of the day what does a person’s car really tell you about the type of man he is? The only thing a car might tell you is the type of money he might have in the bank. We all know people who drive luxury vehicles into project housing or are in unreasonable debt all because they’re trying to stunt. Remember what the first lady said about President Obama’s car when they first started dating? It had a hole in the floor. What would she have missed out on if she’d judged Barack by his car and not his character? Think about it.
Shaq and Hoopz suffer from back and neck pain, respectively.
2. He’s Not Over 6 Foot
Have you ever seen the show, “Tough Love”? Essentially, it centers around a male matchmaker trying to help women explore their issues and get rid of their baggage so they can start to date healthily and potentially find love. One evening Steve, the host and matchmaker, asked the ladies to make a list of all the characteristics they wanted in a man. Inevitably, one of the women wrote that her man had to be over six feet tall. Steve then took the women into a room full of 100 men. When the women read off their qualifications, all of the men who didn’t meet them sat down. When baby girl read the six-foot rule, she was surprised to see how many men sat down, making her viable dating pool smaller than it needed to be. Turns out ladies, only 14.5 percent of American men are six feet and over. Sure you can find him, but it might take a while. And again, just because he’s tall doesn’t mean he can’t be a douche.
3. He doesn’t have a passport
This one’s come up quite a few times. In a real life conversation and then again on a Very Smart Brothas post entitled Shyte Bougie Black Girls Say. This is such a flawed reason not to date someone. If someone doesn’t have a passport it just means they don’t have a passport. It doesn’t necessarily mean they hate all things cultured and never want to the leave America. It may just mean they’ve never had the opportunity to do so. Just because you took one little road trip to Canada does not make you an authority on foreign cultures. Instead of judging, how about you inspire someone to travel.
4. His Gadgets are out of date
Ok, so he’s walking around with a Discman instead of an iPod. He’s not the coolest kid on the block but that doesn’t mean he’s anything to scoff at either. His lack of interest in the latest trend or fad is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it could mean that he’s not materialistic. Don’t get it twisted these are strengths ladies.
5. Because he’s too nice
This one is the worst! You’d think that once we get out of high school, this type of attitude would cease. But sadly, this is not the case. There are far too many women who would rather complain about a bad relationship with a trifilin’ dude than accept a good one with a decent man. I found the perfect summation of this concept in a quote from brotips.com: “Ladies, guys are sick of hearing you ask where all of the “nice guys” are. They’re in the friend zone, where you left them.” Say that! Don’t turn down a good man and then complain about your inability to find someone.
6. He used a coupon on the first date
So what?!? Did you have to come up out of your pocket to pay the bill? No? Then it doesn’t matter how he paid for your evening. I think women erroneously equate this behavior with a man being cheap. Sure he could be cheap, or he could need the money he saved for something else but decided that taking you out was equally important. As rough as the economy is these days, a man who knows how save money while still managing to enjoy life is an asset, not a liability.
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