8 Anti-New Year’s Resolutions To Get You On Track For 2023

Multiracial friends celebrating new years eve with party props in the club and making New Year's resolutions

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When we talk about New Year’s resolutions, eating healthier or spending less tend to come up. However, a survey by the Economist/YouGov found that last year, a top goal Americans wanted to work on was self-improvement and personal happiness. A three-year stretch of a pandemic, political unrest, civil injustices and an unpredictable economy, has a way of making us think about what really matters.

And at the end of the day, it’s our values – the types of people we are and the type of energy we put out into the world. And anyone, no matter their income level, their number of followers or their pant size, has the ability to do better and be better. It’s free. Still, New Year’s resolvers are dropping overall. CBS News reports that the number of Americans feeling “hopeful” about their NYE resolutions dropped by 13 percent last year. Meanwhile, the number of Americans feeling discouraged increased. So, how do we remedy this loss in faith in ourselves?

Maybe it’s about shifting the way we look at New Year’s Resolutions. A long list of things you have to do can be intimidating. So, how about a list of things you won’t be doing? For 2023, consider these anti-New Year’s resolutions to help you feel happier, calmer and more purposeful.

I Will Not People Please

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People pleasing will rob you of your peace, your free time and even your self-esteem. According to research reported on Thrive Global, people pleasing even has an addictive quality. It makes sense when you think about it. You get that instant high of making someone like you or approve of you when you people please. Then there’s the comedown when you realize that in pleasing someone else, you disappointed or even neglected yourself. So maybe you don’t need to quit cigarettes or sugar this year – perhaps for you, you need to quit saying “yes” when you really want to say “no.”

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I Will Not Be Silent In The Face Of Injustice

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Speaking up can feel scary. In fact, PR Newswire reports that people have been feeling more afraid to speak their minds. Instead, people are resorting to tactics like “staying silent but feeling inauthentic” and choosing to “silently fume and stew.” Be the one who speaks up when you see something that’s not right. You can encourage others to do the same. One study reported on in Psychology Today found that when people see or hear of someone else doing the right thing, they’re often inspired to do the same.

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I Will Not Bad Mouth Myself

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If not speaking badly about others is already on your list, make sure to include yourself. Don’t talk down to yourself. Don’t be hard on yourself. When you find yourself saying something negative about yourself, flip it. Force yourself to find a positive thing to say. Research reported on Health Direct shows that positive self-talk can improve self-esteem, fight stress and boost well-being.

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I Will Not Ignore My Intuition

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Your intuition is not something mystical or magical. It is the accumulation of thousands of micro-moments, life lessons, subconscious understanding and wisdom. It’s powerful, so when your logic is telling you one thing but your intuition is screaming at you to do the other, don’t ignore it. Make it your New Year’s resolution to never let outside influences overpower your intuition.

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I Will Not Neglect Self-Care

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It’s time to stop seeing self-care as a luxury and instead start viewing it as a necessity. You are a vessel capable of great things like career accomplishments, caring for others, volunteer work and so much more. But none of that can happen if you don’t take care of that vessel (aka you). Don’t cancel your self-care night because someone asks you to do something. Treat your self-care time as a concrete appointment.

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I Will Not Make Assumptions

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So many conflicts could be avoided if we didn’t make assumptions about people’s intentions or character. Before responding (in your emotions), ask questions. Then ask more questions. Gather all of the information you can before making a judgment or responding to a situation. It could lead to less conflicts in your life, and less stress.

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I Will Not Be Envious

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Envy can get the best of all of us. It’s part of the human condition. But, it never leads anywhere good. It can lead you to gossip, to feel resentful, to engage in negative self-talk and other destructive behaviors. Next time you feel envy creeping in, know that research out of PsyCh Journal shows that gratitude fights envy. So to stop jealousy, pause and count your blessings. Okay, maybe that’s one official New Year’s resolution: being more grateful for what you have.

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I Will Not Play The Blame Game

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Recognizing when other people and situations are problematic has its value – but not a ton of value. Putting blame on others doesn’t usually change much. If you want something to change, the only real path forward is to focus on what you have control over. That isn’t to say that sometimes, other people aren’t the problem. It’s just to say that focusing on that won’t put you even one inch closer to the outcome that you want. So refocus thoughts from, “What did everyone else do?” to “What can I do to change this?”

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