When it comes to relationships, men and women tend to want the same things – it just seems we want or need them in different ways. For most men, respect and love are synonymous and are weighed the same, but how we show love and respect to a man may not always fall in line with what we women expect from our mate. Small gestures can yield great rewards when dealing with the heart of a man, so applying some of these simple practices can breathe air into your relationship by simply letting him know that you love and appreciate him….just as he is.
Gas him up!
Men like compliments too – so if your man has a killer smile, amazing washboard abs or big biceps – tell him! We all know how great we feel when a man pays us a sincere compliment, so letting your man know that you love his style or the way he walks will make him feel 12 feet tall! Choose something specific, and maybe unexpected, that you find attractive about him, and let him know in a genuine way that you only have eyes for him. Try to tell him 3 things that you love about him every day. He’ll be on Cloud 9 for weeks!
Make him feel needed
Most men like to feel useful – whether it’s fixing the kitchen sink, screwing in a light bulb or solving your crisis at work. I’m not suggesting you nag him to death or bog him down with chores, but find ways to let him know you need him by asking him for his help or his advice every once in a while. Men are great problem solvers, and they truly want to help the woman they love through their challenges. The reason most men shy away from “independent” women is because they sometimes send a message that they don’t “need” a man. But being self sufficient doesn’t mean the men in our lives serve no purpose, so let him be the man and thank him for all that he does on a daily basis.
Stroke his ego in the bedroom
Even if he isn’t the best lover you’ve ever had, make him feel as if he is. Men can be very delicate when it comes to their sexual prowess, and they take pleasing their woman very seriously. Let him know how attracted you are to him sexually, how he turns you on, and what you love about his body. Send him a text saying you can’t wait to get home to him and turn him out, then drink a Red Bull and get ready. He’ll be so turned up you’ll need all your energy to handle the monster you’ve created!
Ask him about his job and praise his accomplishments
Most men take pride in their career and place a certain value on the level of success they’ve achieved. In most cases, men tie success directly to their manhood, and their work gives them a sense of purpose. If they share their achievements with you, it’s because they want to impress you, and show you that they are capable of providing a future for you both – so acknowledge that! Be his biggest cheerleader and give him the admiration and respect he seeks and deserves – the returns will be tenfold.
Ask him about his interests or hobbies as well
All work and no play can make any man a dull boy…so ask him what he likes to do for fun – and be genuine about it. I know for some women, we really couldn’t care less what a touchdown or an RBI is, but it wouldn’t kill us to sit with him while he’s watching the game and ask questions (during the commercial). He’ll be delighted that you’re interested in something he enjoys, and if he is truly digging you, he will gladly share and feel special that you have an interest in HIS interests.
Laugh at his jokes
Men LOVE a woman with a good sense of humor – it shows she doesn’t take life…or herself too seriously. Men also tend to tie their sense of humor to their egos, so if we show them that we get their jokes, and actually think they’re funny, it’s a sign of approval and validation in a fun way. Appreciating a man’s comedic delivery can mean that we understand him, thus creating a connection…and what’s not to love about a person with a funny sense of self?
Cater to him sometimes
If your man has been hard at work or stressed out, rub his neck or give him a nice massage. Draw him a bath or prepare a nice meal for him. Even if you aren’t much of the “domestic” type, catering to your man can simply mean not crowding him as soon as he walks in the door, giving him time to unwind before you launch into a speech about how your day was or what needs to get done around the house. Sometimes realizing that he wants you there, but that he doesn’t feel like talking, is all the catering you need to do. So hand him the remote, let him kick his feet up and be quiet. When he’s ready to talk, ask him how his day was…and listen.
Don’t sweat the small stuff
Not everything in a relationship needs to be over analyzed or beaten down into the ground. So if he unintentionally offends you by not noticing your new hairstyle, let it go. Focus on what he does right instead of harping on everything he does wrong. So he left a glass in the sink…so what??? Be forgiving. Praise his great decisions and minimize his bad ones. Don’t say “I told you so” or take the opportunity to always have the last word. Don’t argue just to hear yourself talk, and don’t focus on always being “right.” Give him the benefit of the doubt and don’t expect him to read your mind. Chances are he really doesn’t know why you’re upset or what he did wrong – and we know that. Just let it go.
Brag about him to your friends
Men love this. Giving him compliments privately is a wonderful thing, but letting the world know how great your man is will having him blushing and wondering how he got so lucky to have a woman like you. Even when he’s not around, let others know what you love and appreciate about your boo. It sets the tone for mutual respect, love and admiration as he will do the same for you unconsciously. It’s easy for us to get complacent in our relationships, so doing a little boasting about your man every once in a while can serve as a reminder of why you love him and just how important he is to you.
