The Pros And Cons Of Giving Your Only Child Sibling

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The decision to expand your family is not an easy one. Parents of one child often feel guilty about not giving their child a sibling. At the same time, having another child is a major life decision that should not be taken lightly. If you’re unsure of whether or not you want to have another kid, here are some pros and cons to help assist you in making your decision.

Pro: Someone to lean one when you’re gone

While we hate to think about our mortality, it’s hard for parents to not consider what will happen to our children when we are no longer here. Losing a parent is never easy, but having a sibling to lean on can make the grief more bearable. It can help them to feel less alone in the world and they can take solace in the fact that there is someone else who feels the same exact pain that they do.

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Con: Less one-on-one time

Parenting multiple children means that you will have to learn to split your time multiple ways, which can be both challenging and taxing. Some moms report feelings guilt over not being able to devote as much time and energy as they’d like to each of their children.

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Pro: Lifelong friend

There are few bonds stronger than the ones formed between siblings. They’re the only people who know you as well as, if not better, than your parents. In most cases, siblings go on to form strong friendships that last a lifetime and when they have children, their kids are close as well.

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Con: You’ll need more space

Depending on the size of your dwelling, expanding your family may mean you need to relocate to make more space for your growing family. More space can result in greater living expenses, so it’s definitely something you’ll want to consider before deciding to have another baby.

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Pro: They will always have someone to play with

One of the most highly reported benefits of having more than one child, especially those who are closer in age, is the luxury of having a built-in playmate. Parents with multiple children often spend less time coordinating playdates because their children are able to amuse one another.

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Con: You’ll have to spend more on tuition

If you choose to take the private school route, multiple children mean that school fees will be much more costly. This may mean that you’re unable to enroll your kids in the school of your choice because you have chosen a more cost-effective institution.

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Con: Your bond will be strong, but may not be as strong as parents of only children

Only children have a reputation for being more self-centered than children who have siblings. While these claims have been debunked by science, researchers did find that only children tend to be a little closer to their parents than those with siblings. According to Scientific American, “Twenty five percent of only children considered their relationship with their parents positive. Just under 24 percent of firstborns, 20 percent of middle children and 18 percent of youngest children also reported very good relationships with their parents.”

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Con: You’ll have to deal with some bickering

When you have children who are close in age, a little bickering is par for the course. Some parents report that it drives them mad and that they hate having to referee disagreements. However, in reality, it’s perfectly normal and the children eventually outgrow it.

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Con: You may have less alone time

Most moms report having minimal alone time with just one child. So you can imagine how that much-needed me-time is cut even shorter when you’re caring for multiple children and you’re forced to divide your time. If free time is what you value most, it may be a good idea to keep your family small.

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Con: Your budget may be tighter

Children are costly and having more than one can mean a much tighter budget. From extracurricular activities to school fees to a higher grocery bill, children are sure to drive up your monthly expenses. At the same time, it’s worth it to note that having multiple children doesn’t condemn you to a life of struggle. You’ll just have to be much more budget-conscious.