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Bad days come and go

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People choose to remain in love triangles for a variety of reasons. Some stay for the kids. Some stay to maintain their lifestyle. Some stay to save face. Some stay because they genuinely love the person and can’t manage to let go. Then there are others who stay because they have adopted problematic mindsets which lead them to believe that holding on to a piece of a man is better than being lonely. Here are ten problematic things women tell themselves to hold onto to a man who is seeing other women.

“He still comes home to me”

If he’s out running with women in his spare time, does it really matter that he makes it home in time to kiss his partner goodnight? Someone’s decision to return home to their family at night after being unfaithful all day is not admirable and it’s nothing worth bragging about.

Vulnerable looking young adult female in defiant portrait

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“He always comes back”

A man’s pattern of returning to one particular woman after he’s been with other women is not reflective of his love, loyalty, or commitment to her. It simply shows that she will tolerate him sneaking around with other women behind her back.

Woman looking at her reflection in the mirror

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“I’m number one”

Some women are perfectly content with sharing, but the majority of us are not. And while they may try to convince themselves and other people that they’re cool with how things are, women who have to shout from the rooftops that they’re “his number one” definitely aren’t okay with sharing. However, they settle for the title of “number one” and attempt to use it to distinguish themselves from the other women their partner is entertaining.

Couple Kissing

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“What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her”

The main woman isn’t the only one who tells herself crazy and problematic things to make herself feel better about her man’s infidelity. Women who play second fiddle also resort to flawed logic to justify their decision to sneak around with men in relationships. A popular one is that she technically isn’t hurting the main woman if she has no knowledge of what’s going on. It’s how she settles for conscience for breaking girl code.

Sad afro woman sitting on a bed

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“I had him first”

Another way that women rationalize sleeping with a man in a relationship is that they were around before he met his current partner.

Man kissing neck of woman in bed

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“If she was doing her job, he wouldn’t be here”

Sadly, there are some women will actually blame a man’s partner to justify her decision to creep around with him. They argue that the partner must be doing something wrong for him to be seeking women outside of the relationship and that if she was doing “her job,” he wouldn’t be out in these streets.

Close up of pregnant African woman's hand on bare belly

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“But I have his kids”

Another way that women attempt to separate themselves from the other women in his life is by using their children. Apparently, having kids by a womanizer gives her a higher rank.

Marital Problems Sulking Wife and Pleading Husband in Bedroom

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“A man is gonna be a man, but she should know better”

When infidelity is discovered, there are some who direct all of their anger at the other woman without ever holding the man accountable. Apparently, strangers should be more loyal to you than your own partner because #girlcode.

Sad afro woman sitting on a bed

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“She’s just a phase”

Some women choose to stick by a cheating partner by telling themselves that he’s just going through a phase and that when all is said and done, she will be the last woman standing. Unfortunately, men like this will usually just swap one side chick out for another.

Engagement ring in a box and pink roses

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“I got the ring”

When women are determined to hold onto a cheater, sometimes, the only thing that they can say to comfort themselves is that they’re the only one with a ring. While the ring does symbolize eternal love, it means nothing if the people wearing them aren’t committed to the relationship.