Family & Parenting

Things You Forgot To Thank Your Mother For

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mother's day 2019

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With Mother’s Day around the corner, it’s the ideal time to sit down and think about all of the things your mother has done for you. Maybe you two don’t always get along. Maybe you even argue, quite a bit—hey, the mother/daughter relationship is a complicated one—but you can’t say your mother doesn’t care about you deeply. In fact, her intense love for you is the very reason you fight. You know that the real opposite of love is indifference. Fighting a lot just means you are able to trigger extreme anger in each other because you love each other so much. Maybe if you are yourself now a mother, you have come to learn all of the things your mom did for you—the things that you neglected to thank her for. And even if you aren’t a mother, you probably have moments of clarity when you realize that your mom is allowed to nitpick at you because she, you know, made you. For Mother’s Day, here are 15 things to thank your mom for—even if you don’t always get along.

For giving you life

If you don’t know yet what an absolute horror pregnancy can be—and that’s not even touching on childbirth yet—then give yourself an old fashioned health class refresher and watch a video. Your mom did that so that you can live, breathe, walk, love, dance, learn, make friends, and do all the things you get to do in this life.

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**For keeping you alive for 18 years**

You don’t even know all the times she saved your life—literally. From ages zero to the mid teens, she saved you from yourself so many times. She stalked you as a toddler to keep you from eating toxic things around the house. As a teen, she forbid you from meeting that “boy” you met online at the mall (could’ve been a murderer). She truly took on an active role of just keeping you alive and safe—and that was no small job.

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For finding ways to make childhood fun

Remember all of the ways she made childhood fun for you? She’d make up games to play, find little excursions for you, host play dates, and do what she could to make sure you were always entertained and always learning.

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For comforting you when you cried as a kid

As a child, you must have cried thousands of times—for maybe no reason at all. But your mom instantly scooped you up, held you, and wouldn’t let go until you felt better. Whether it was over a kid who stole your toy or a loud sound that frightened you, you were quick to cry, and your mom was quick to make it stop.

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And comforting you when you cry as an adult

You still call your mom when you cry as an adult. Like after the many, many breakups you’ve endured. Or after getting yelled at by your boss. Or after having a friend hurt your feelings. You can still call your mom, and she’ll instantly drop what she’s doing to console you.

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For instilling you with confidence

Growing up, there must have been so many times that your mom told you to go for something. There must have been so many times, even, when you failed, and she told you anyways that you were strong and smart—and politics or some other dumb thing were the only reason you didn’t win the day.

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For putting food on the table

That’s a pretty big one. If you are a mother now, you’ve come to learn that this is a daily—nay, hourly—battle. Keeping the home stocked with snacks kids want and preparing meals that are nutritious and kids will actually eat keeps you hard at work all of the time.

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For tolerating your teenage years

You were probably no treat as a teenager—few teenagers are. You may have even told your mom that you hated her a few times. And she never said it back to you. She still showed you love. She endured it, and she gave you tough love so you could get past that time without making truly stupid mistakes like dropping out of high school and running off with a much older boyfriend.

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For taking an interest in every boyfriend

From your first young love in, say, middle school through all of those college sweethearts, your mom met everyone. Your mom took an interest in everyone. And now you know that your mom knew that none of those relationships would last (because you were a teenager). Yet, she still cared, asked about them, and comforted you during the breakup.

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For having uncomfortable talks with you

Talks about having sex, about consent, about different types of birth control, about your period. If you think those talks weren’t fun for you, just think about how your mom must have felt.

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For not spoiling you—too much

When you were younger, maybe you were angry with your mom for making you get a summer job or for not buying you every expensive item you wanted. Now you’re glad she didn’t spoil you. You know spoiled adults and, it ain’t pretty.

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For cheering you on

Applying for internships, doing internships, applying for those first jobs, going out for interviews, getting that first job—your mom has cheered you on through it all. She has called to see how the interview went. She has looked over your resume. She never let you feel alone with this.

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For teaching you the little things

Like how to do laundry, how to drive, how to balance a checkbook, and how to make rice. She made sure you went out into the world a functioning adult who could take care of herself.

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For worrying about you every day

Yes, sometimes the worrying can be too much—sometimes she is overbearing and calls too often. But, for that very reason, you know that she is always there for you. You always have her embrace and support to run to when the world becomes scary.

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For the many hidden sacrifices

Who knows what else your mom may have done for you, that you don’t even know, because she didn’t want you to know. Did she give up a career for you? Did she stay in a town she couldn’t stand, because it had a good school district? Did she limit herself from having things she wanted, so she could buy you things? I’m sure some of this is true. Thank her.

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