Friends You Should Give Another Chance After A Falling Out

1 of 15

❯

❮

falling out between friends

Gettyimages.com/Girlfriends in conflict are sitting on the bench and sulking each other

Considering how much we grow and change during the first 30 or so years of our lives (and we never really stop learning), it’s no wonder we lose some friends during our formative years. We go through phases when we are certain that this or that is our new, top priority. Any friends who don’t fall in line with that get the boot. Then we have friends who decide that we don’t fit into their lifestyle and goals anymore. And now, today, I look back and realize how silly I was. I was going through a phase. I thought I knew who the new, permanent me was but the truth is, I was still developing into the woman I’d be. Unfortunately, there were some casualties along the way in the friend department that perhaps wouldn’t have occurred if I’d known them today. If you feel this is true for you then here are friends you should give another chance after a falling out.

The boyfriend-obsessed

You know that friend who became so obsessed with her relationship, would bring her man to girls’ night, would cancel on you at the last minute to be with her guy, and always talk about her relationship? She may have grown up since then and learned how to balance her priorities. We can all get a little boyfriend-obsessed in our first serious relationships.

SEE ALSO

The career-obsessed

Then there was that friend who became power-hungry and had illusions of grandeur. She only wanted to spend time with other people who were climbing the ladder to success. She pushed you out to make room for people she presumed would help her career. That can happen to all of us when we have that first taste of success. But if she’s since been humbled, and seems to have leveled out, you could have a friendship again.

SEE ALSO

The social climber

This one made you pretty angry. She became too cool to hang out with you. She went to events with the “in crowd” and said you couldn’t come along because there were “limited tickets” and other BS like that. Unfortunately, a lot of people go through this social climbing phase in college and their early twenties. If she’s re-learned the value of good, real friends, then give her another chance.

SEE ALSO

The flaky one

You just couldn’t count on this one. She double booked. She’d forget she had something else to do. She’d forget about your plans. She disrespected your schedule so many times that you unfriended her. But also, if she was a kid (early twenties or so), that behavior is common. If she’s ready to respect your time, you could get back a friend that you actually really enjoyed being around.

SEE ALSO

The self-involved one

She’d talk and talk and talk about herself for the whole hangout. She wouldn’t ask about you. She was just fixating on…her breakup or…her fight with her mom. Honestly, learning how to have a balanced conversation is a skill that some people just take a while to pick up. But if this friend had a good heart, it could be worth checking in and seeing if she’s changed. You could also gently tell her she talks to damn much.

SEE ALSO

The hard partier

The friend that fell in with the wrong crowd or just wanted to get drunk out of her mind every day. Maybe she was going through something. Maybe she was escaping some emotional issues. If you’ve heard that she’s cleaned up her act, it could be worth touching base.

SEE ALSO

The old boyfriend stealer

Now this is a sensitive topic, but think about it: now you know you were never going to marry your old high school boyfriend! And you know your friend who stole that boyfriend has probably since grown up, and realized she shouldn’t do that. Is it really worth losing an old friend over Billy from the 10^th grade?

SEE ALSO

The one who got into a cult

Well, maybe not a cult but, a very possessive sorority or some fitness/healthy living group that demanded all of her time. They also had her talking as if she was better than everyone else. It sounded like she was in a cult. Hey, everyone can feel a little lost sometimes and wind up in a situation like that. If she’s out of it, it may be interesting to grab some coffee and see how she’s changed.

SEE ALSO

The one who called you boyfriend-obsessed

Uh oh. Two can play that game. Perhaps you were the one who was once boyfriend-obsessed and a friend called you out for it. You didn’t like that. You said she was being crazy or jealous and you stopped being friends. In retrospect, you were boyfriend obsessed and you owe that old friend an apology.

SEE ALSO

The good friend/bad roommate

So you made the mistake of turning a best friend into a roommate and then your friendship fell apart. If you’ve had some time away from each other, you may just realize that you weren’t meant to live together. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still be great friends.

SEE ALSO

The one who accused you of social-climbing

And the tables are turned again. Did you once ditch your core crew to be with the “cool kids” who had VIP access at clubs, knew local celebrities, or had lots of money? You’ve since learned how vapid those friendships are and you probably miss your real friends. Maybe they’ll take you back if you make a good apology.

SEE ALSO

The one who found you career-obsessed

Perhaps you were the one who was all about making money and becoming powerful. Perhaps you disregarded your friends who actually were your biggest cheerleaders because you didn’t see them as ambitious or powerful. Perhaps now you realize how valuable having good friends, who have nothing to do with your career, really is.

SEE ALSO

The once-friend-turned-ex

Remember that really good guy friend you dated for a minute and ended things with? You had a great friendship before it became something more, and then the poor guy wound up in your pile of exes and you stopped talking. Dig him out of the pile of exes. You’ve had time apart. He made a good friend.

SEE ALSO

The overly-needy one

She was too much. She wanted to see you every day. She texted a lot. She was always in your business. But look…she probably just liked you a lot, needed a friend, and has some self-confidence issues. Can’t you relate to that? Maybe rather than kick her out of your life, you could just set some boundaries.

SEE ALSO

The one who apologizes

It takes a lot of humility to apologize and a lot of self-reflection to realize what one has done wrong. If someone does this for you, give her another chance. You’d want the same if you were the one apologizing.

SEE ALSO

Related Tags

broken friendships forgiveness

More from MadameNoire