Bridesmaid Politics Nobody Wants To Talk About - Page 13

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From my understanding, being a groomsman is pretty simple. The groom just calls you up (or more likely texts you), asks you to be in his wedding party, you say yes, and get ready to rage your b*lls off at the bachelor party, and rent a tux at some point. Any woman who has ever been in a wedding party probably feels pretty jealous hearing that, right? It doesn’t seem like grooms make their groomsmen come over and arrange the guest gift bags with them. Grooms don’t make their best men attend not one but multiple tux fittings with them. Being a groomsman is a pretty sweet, hands-off deal. Being a bridesmaid is another story. It can be stressful on both the bridal party and the bride. You have women who wished they were bridesmaids who aren’t and women who are who don’t want to be. You have a bride trying to make everyone happy. And during all of this, everyone must appear cheery and positive so the bride doesn’t have a meltdown. Here are bridesmaid politics nobody talks about.

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No dress flatters everyone

Look: the bride will try very, very hard to find a dress that can at least come close to flattering everyone. Those wrap-type dresses that can be adjusted into many styles are quite popular for bridesmaids dresses. But ultimately, she has one bridesmaid who is six feet tall, another who is five foot one, one who is as svelte as a ballerina and one who just had a baby so, no, they won’t all look phenomenal in the same dress.

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Some sleep at the bride’s place, for free

One or two select bridesmaids are offered the bride’s home as accommodations during the wedding. Perhaps they bought a $1,200 plane ticket to come from far, far away or they’re just broke. So, as a peace offering, the bride doesn’t make them get a hotel. The other bridesmaids do need to pay for hotels and they aren’t happy about it.

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The night-before slumber party crew

It’s a tradition that the bride and groom spend the night before the wedding apart. The bride typically spends that night with her bridesmaids, who are to be her support system. But, let’s be real: some of her bridesmaids just stress her out and are the last people she wants to be with the night before her big day. So, she says that she could only afford one hotel room that night and only three women fit in it.

Gettyimages.com/Shot of the bride and bridesmaids taking a selfie with a cellphonehttp://195.154.178.81/DATA/i_collage/pu/shoots/784347.jpg

There’s the official MOH

There is the official maid of honor. For political reasons, she makes the most sense. Nobody will bat an eyelash at the fact that she’s the MOH. She is perhaps the older sister or the childhood friend.

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Then there’s the secret MOH

Then there is the unofficial maid of honor—this is the person the bride feels closer to, and who she knows she can actually rely on to help her during the wedding. She may ask this person to be her unofficial MOH, even though she can’t give her the title.

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The desired bachelorette party guest list

The bride doesn’t actually want all the women who she invites to the bachelorette party at the bachelorette party. She naturally has to invite all of the bridesmaids but, keep in mind that some of them are her…cousin or sister-in law. She doesn’t feel comfortable really letting loose in front of them.

Gettyimages.com/The bride is trying out her wedding dress accompanied by her friends

Including the groom’s sisters

Sometimes, the bride has to make her groom’s sister a bridesmaid. She is very sensitive, or there is pressure from his family. So, she makes a woman she barely knows her bridesmaid.

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Including the groom’s sister-in-law

Then, in rare cases, the bride even has to make the groom’s sister-in-law a bridesmaid aka the groom’s brother’s wife. This feels like a stretch for the bride but, there comes a point when, the real sister and cousin are included, so leaving out the in-law feels rude.

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Limiting speeches because of one bridesmaid

Very often, the bride makes a rule that only pre-selected individuals are allowed to make speeches at the wedding. She’ll say its due to time constraints but it’s actually because one of her bridesmaids would inevitably make the speech a pity party all about herself.

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The overly sensitive bridesmaid

There is always that one overly sensitive bridesmaid who forgets that her only task is to make the bride happy and instead thinks this is her time to shine as a wedding planner and leader. She gets very upset if people meet all of her ideas with less than resounding enthusiasm.

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The lazy bridesmaid

Then there is the bridesmaid who takes no initiative. The bride has to ask one of her more organized bridesmaids to keep an eye on the lazy one and make sure she stays on top of her tasks.

Gettyimages.com/Three laughing young women are enjoying themselves in a nightclub or at a party and taking a selfie with an unseen mobile phone.

No bachelorette party location pleases all

The bachelorette party will, of course, be a problem for some. If one bridesmaid is already traveling far for the wedding, she’ll feel totally screwed over if she must also travel far for the bachelorette party. But there is nott one bachelorette party location that will make everyone happy.

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The bridesmaid seating arrangements

Then you have the one or two bridesmaids who are single and won’t be bringing a date to the wedding. You know they’ll be upset if you don’t seat them next to someone fun or cute. They feel like it’s the least you owe them after all they’ve done for you.

Gettyimages.com/wedding taking place outdoors in Maasai Mara Game Reserve, Kenya

What you see is not what the bride wanted

When you see the bride standing up there, saying her vows, with a line of bridesmaids behind her, just know that what you see is not exactly what she wanted.