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I’ve always been turned off by men who use money to attract women. The second a man attempts, in any way, to dangle some sort of financial prize in front of me to have my attention, I completely write him off. There’s no in between there. It doesn’t matter if the guy is bragging about his celebrity connections or straight up telling me he could buy me that luxury car that just drove by: if a man tries to use money or status to gain my affection, he loses it forever. And I’ll admit that it’s because I learned the hard way that these guys…are kind of the worst. I did date a couple of men who charmed me with expensive dates, gifts, and trips. And they both turned out to be rather emotionally vapid and rather controlling (surprise). Yup. Turns out when a man gets you with money, he thinks he owns you. I understand that wealth can change a relationship, but, I can’t stand men like this. Here are ways men use money to attract women (and it’s gross).
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Buying a round for your friends
If I’ve been chatting with the guy for a while, clearly hitting it off, and I only have one or two friends with me, it’s not a big deal if he buys the round. But then there are those men who haven’t even made contact, who take care of the bill for my table of ten women. I repeat: they haven’t spoken to any of us yet. But they clearly think we’re now theirs for the night. Sorry—we’re gonna bounce. Nobody asked for that.
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Paying to skip the wait
I need someone who is humble enough to wait in the short line for the restaurant or bar like a regular person. Paying the host or bouncer a large sum of cash for special treatment doesn’t impress me; it just me thinks the guy is a baby who is impatient.
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Over the top cars
A really expensive luxury car is basically like a giant banner that screams, “Like me for my money!” or “Golddiggers, follow me!” I’ve never met a Lamborghini owner who was emotionally present and available, or a good listener.
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“You wouldn’t have to work if we were together”
Yuck. I can’t believe some men have actually said this to me but they have—after finding out that I work for a living, they’ve made some comment to the effect of, “I have so much money that if we were together, you could quit working entirely.” Oh, and be your toy. How fun for me. It doesn’t occur to these men that I might actually like to work. I don’t just do it until some man saves me from it.
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The pool cabana
Men who buy $1,500 day cabanas by the pool, are you really so special that you couldn’t possibly sit on a lounge chair with the masses? I’m not drawn to your cabana. I’m glad that you’re isolated—stay over there in your tent.
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The club table
I have news for men who buy bottle service at clubs and suddenly find themselves surrounded by women: they’re there for the free drinks and not for you. Or, because some bouncer told them they could skip the line if they’d be willing to sit at your table (to make you, the customer, happier).
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Designer clothes
A man who wears blatant designer clothes is, in my opinion, a man who cannot think for himself. He has no personal style. He just throws some money at the sales associate and asks her to make it obvious that he buys expensive brands. I prefer guys who can put together a flattering outfit in a thrift store.
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The expensive but bland apartment
Both of the wealthy men I dated, who flaunted their money, had these very expensive condos on top of high rises in trendy areas. And their apartments were sad, cold, empty, heartless places. They had no character. It was clear these men just bought the most expensive condo in the most upscale area they could find and didn’t have a clue what to do with it. Give me the man with a studio apartment that he decorates to reflect his personality.
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Name-dropping
I do not care if someone knows the owner of every exclusive venue in town or if they are friends with celebrities. Those relationships are bought through money and status. I like a man who has a close group of friends he’s known for ages—since childhood—who like him for who he is, and not what he has.
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Surrounding themselves with women
Some wealthy men attract women by surrounding themselves with other women who are willing to be there for the money. In other words, they have a posse of females who will follow them for the table service, pool cabanas, and VIP rooms. If a man needs to prove that women want him by essentially paying women to be around, I want nothing to do with him.
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Never checking the price
I don’t think it’s impressive when a man orders something by saying, “Give me the most expensive thing you have” or “I don’t need to see prices.” I think it’s financially irresponsible and socially ridiculous.
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Weekend getaways
Look, getting away for the weekend is nice. But I noticed the rich guys I dated always wanted us to travel because, well, just being in town with them, chilling, wasn’t fun or exciting. Because they weren’t fun. They needed to use money to provide a good time. If I can’t have fun with a man drinking cheap beer at home, then I’m out.
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Taking risks
For some reason, many rich men think that they are invincible—immortal even. They like to do dangerous things like drive 120 MPH or collect and play with weapons they don’t understand. That’s not thrilling to me; that’s immature. And it shows a huge lack of gratitude for life.
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Expensive hobbies
If someone feels that yachting and driving around a racetrack are hobbies, good riddance to him. I don’t have patience for someone who requires that much stuff to have fun.
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Criticizing men who make less
Any time a man tries to make himself look good by making another man look bad, I’m completely disgusted. If you’re so certain of yourself, then you shouldn’t have to put others down. Your “greatness” should speak for itself.
