Why pining after someone is a waste of time

Gettyimages.com/Shot of black businessman and African-American business woman on the go holding coffee cup and digital tablet and smiling in New York City, USA. City and skyscrapers in the back.

Remember how deliciously painful your first teen “love” was? I put that in quotations because you now know that wasn’t really love. You didn’t even know who you were as a teenager, let alone what you needed in a partner. You were in love with love. You were infatuated with the idea of love. Getting romantic attention excited you or, giving romantic attention excited you. Now, that is all fine and good for when we’re kids but, once we’re grown*ss adults, we can’t be out there, pining after people. If you are interested in someone, you should make that known. Then you can see if the interest is mutual, and go on from there. I have too many well-meaning, good-hearted male friends who are pining after their female best friends or the barista at their favorite coffee shop who never make a move. And, it’s not good for anyone. Here is why it’s never good to pine after somebody.

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You distance yourself

When you pine after someone, you automatically create a sort of distance. You put them on a pedastol, and create this emotional separation. They’re way over there, and you’re way over here. You act in a way that heightens that distance, and then the person probably just thinks you don’t like them at all.