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I’m a messy person and my live-in boyfriend is a tidy person—a very tidy person. I actually had to prepare to live together by beginning to train myself to be neater for half a year before we moved in together. I would choose one new thing to focus on each couple of weeks, get in the habit of that, and then add a new, tidy habit. My partner is very grateful for this, and definitely says I’ve improved. In fact, my level of messiness no longer gives him panic attacks! (Okay, almost never gives him those). But, at the end of the day, it’s sort of in our DNA to be messy or tidy, don’t you think? Messiness comes natural to some, while tidiness seems to feel easy to others—like my boyfriend. At the end of the day, it’s my habits that give my partner anxiety and not the other way around, so I try to make accommodations for what he needs in the home, even if I don’t always understand it. Here are things messy and tidy people can’t see eye to eye on.

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Tables are for things

I’ve had many roommates point out how many things I keep on the tables, from the coffee table, to the side table, to the desk. As far as I’m concerned, aren’t tables for things?! I mean, at least I didn’t put those things on the floor.

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Shoeless homes

My boyfriend wants a shoeless apartment. I agreed to it, and came around to the idea because I’ve definitely noticed it keeps our floors cleaner. But also, it’s not like we eat off the floors, so what’s a little shoe dust? We clean the floors twice a month either way.

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Dogs on the bed

When I first started dating my boyfriend, he had a no-dog-on-the-bed rule. Admittedly, the dog is mine, I’ve always had dogs, and my boyfriend had never lived with a dog. But I assured him that, even though he made valid points about her dragging in dirt from the street and getting hair everywhere, he’d fall in love with her and change his mind. And he did.

Bigstockphoto.com/High Angle View Of Young African Female Janitor Cleaning Hardwood Floor With Vacuum Cleaner

Cleaning the cleaning tools

Why do we clean cleaning tools?! Tidy people clean the things they use to clean things. They wipe down vacuums, they clean the insides of trashcans—it makes no sense to me.

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Regularly washing towels

When I use a towel on my face or body, it’s because my face and body have just been cleaned. So, if you ask me, towels practically never need washing. Okay…I know that’s not entirely true, but my boyfriend washes his body towels after a few uses, and that seems excessive to me.

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Saving up dirty dishes

My partner is a clean-as-you-go type. When it comes to dishes, I like to clean all of my dishes, from all three of my day’s meals, at the end of the day. But the little pile that creates on the left side of the sink gets my boyfriend pretty anxious.

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Taking out the trash daily

I say, make the most use of every trash bag, and only empty the trash when it’s totally full. My boyfriend likes to take it out around every day or at least every other day, because he doesn’t like the idea of food rotting inside the apartment.

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Saving paper/plastic bags

I guess I’m a bit of a bag lady, but I like to keep grocery store bags and use them to put our recycling in. That being said, we don’t seem to recycle at the same pace I collect these bags and our under-the-sink cabinet is bursting with bags. My boyfriend, naturally, doesn’t like this.