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We’d like to think that life isn’t some old, Shakespearean play in which only individuals from families of “similar standing” can marry. And look—it’s not like that, but there is no denying that when two people get together from drastically different financial backgrounds, everyone feels it. They can’t help it. In fact, many individuals from wealthy families don’t realize just how privileged their upbringing was until they become seriously involved (platonically or romantically) with someone who didn’t come from such an upbringing. When you are going to build your life with someone whose family had significantly fewer means than your own, there are bound to be some awkward moments. You can’t not address it. This is especially true when it’s the woman coming from a wealthier family, because men have hang-ups about being providers. Here is what it’s like when your family is very wealthy and his isn’t.

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Only your parents can help financially

There might be times when you and your partner need some financial help—maybe a cosigner on a home, for example. Only your parents will have the means or credit to help you with that, leaving his parents feeling a bit useless.

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Splitting the bill at family dinners

When your two families go out to dinner together, your parents need to be aware that your boyfriend or husband’s parents can’t afford the types of places your parents can. Sometimes your parents will just have to foot the bill.

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His family may be shy to have yours over

Your partner’s family might be timid about hosting your family for meals because they worry their home isn’t up to your family’s standards. It really can be tough to get your parents, and your partner’s parents, to develop a relationship with these types of insecurities occurring.

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Things will balance out

Eventually, everybody will get to know one another and realize that all (or at least most) people involved have good intentions. They’re just looking out for their children and loved ones. Your partner will drop some of his insecurities about his background, and your family will stop worrying that he can take care of you because he clearly will.