Here are things female friends talk about that male friends don’t

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Okay, I’ll be honest: when my boyfriend hosts guys’ night at our place and I say I’m going to hide away in the guest room and watch movies, I overhear what they talk about. I tried to turn the volume up on my laptop I swear! But, I could still hear what they said. And the drunker they became, the more open their conversation became. But real talk: there are some topics men just don’t seem to touch. I’d hear them touch on the topics, but then drop them like a hot potato. I’d even hear an awkward silence and some clearing of throats, as if someone did something taboo by bringing that topic up. Then there are things men just don’t need to worry about because, well, they’re men. Boys’ night chatter sounds a lot different from girl’s night chatter, that’s for sure. Here are things female friends talk about that male friends don’t.

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Being harassed

Women dedicate quite a bit of time to telling one another stories of being sexually harassed by coworkers, our brother’s friends, or strangers on the street. Men…they don’t really have stories to share like that.

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How to avoid harassment

This deserves its own topic: how to avoid harassment. Women have a lot of tips on how to avoid and deal with sexual harassment and cat calling as it comes up. We’ve had to put quite a bit of time into coming up with these tactics.

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Our genitals

Sure, men might reference their genitals, but they don’t speak in detail about them the way women do. We talk about smells, textures, fluids, sounds, and doctors appointments in detail.

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Health tips

We also talk a lot about health—about this supplement for immunity, that food for better sleep, this particular rash to look out for and just about anything we’ve learned about health that week.

Relationship lessons

Women know the value of analyzing our past relationships. We don’t move onto a new one until we have thoroughly dissected the old ones with our girlfriends. Honestly, it’s a practice men should take up (I’m looking at you, dude who is living with a third new girlfriend who you’ve only been with for two months).

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One another’s relationships

We also analyze the current relationships of friends who are not present at girls’ night. Hey, we’re just trying to make sure they aren’t repeating old habits.

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Our weight

Yes, we talk about our weight—okay? We don’t want to. Really, we don’t. We try not to. But society drills the topic into our brains. Men don’t talk about weight—they talk about strength, lifting, reps, and the like.

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Our family drama

If a man asks his friend how things are going with his dad, he’ll say something like, “The same.” If a woman asks her female friend how he relationship with her mom is going, she has a 20-minute story coming her way.

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Problem clothes

The clothes that always pinch, the clothes that make our vaginas sweat, the clothes that create the illusion of armpit fat where there isn’t any—we are experts on problem clothes.

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Sex details

I was surprised to discover that men don’t really talk in detail about sex. They might tell their friends that sex occurred, but they won’t talk about technique, products used, and more in-depth details.

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Our goals, in detail

Women love to talk about our goals. We need to run ideas off of our friends and turn to one another for motivation and inspiration. We’ll talk about our doubts, fears, and mistakes made. Men just sort of give one another the factual updates on their careers.

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Date fails

If a man doesn’t like the way his date went and his friends ask about it, he can answer them literally with a “so-so” hand gesture. Women will break down the date and figure out exactly where it went wrong—down to the minute.

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Hair maintenance

Leg hair, arm hair, upper lip hair, armpit hair, vagina hair, butt hair—we talk about it all. We talk about the best way to get rid of it, the lotions to use on the area, what hair styles men like down-south and more. Men do not need to discuss their hair.

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Bargains

Women love a bargain! We just do. I don’t know why. I really couldn’t tell you. All I can do is tell you that we will tell you the half-hour story of how we finally found that $20 chair. With men it’s, “Cool chair” and “Thanks.”